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Oy vey, oy vey
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<blockquote data-quote="Malika" data-source="post: 577574" data-attributes="member: 11227"><p>Just an update... this morning J was, as he usually is, sweet and affectionate. And calm. He didn't want to but I talked about what had happened yesterday. He told me that he had been angry with one of the assistants and that he had wanted to play before he left the school instead of leaving like that. Makes sense. I said that he could have spoken, he could have told me that, that I would always listen to him and try to find a solution if I could - getting upset and angry like that just meant everyone got upset and angry and no solution could be found. He seemed to understand.</p><p>Up to now I have not pushed things like getting the psychiatrist to come and speak to the school in a meeting, which she is willing to do. Partly because I don't want to make J different from the others and partily because I don't have full confidence that they would really understand even after that and implement changes such as not punishing him all the time. We are getting to the heart of the matter... what do you do when people don't know anything about ADHD (or whatever) and don't really want to know? Yes, there is a law here as elsewhere that children with differences have to be accommodated but in practice... It becomes clearer that another, more human system is probably going to be better for us all but J does also need to learn to read and write, etc... </p><p>I do have to take a decision about all this, obviously. Where is the place, is there a place, where J's differences and difficulties can be viewed with understanding, tolerance and compassion rather than incomprehension, intolerance and judgement? Which is probably the 64,000 dollar question for us all.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Malika, post: 577574, member: 11227"] Just an update... this morning J was, as he usually is, sweet and affectionate. And calm. He didn't want to but I talked about what had happened yesterday. He told me that he had been angry with one of the assistants and that he had wanted to play before he left the school instead of leaving like that. Makes sense. I said that he could have spoken, he could have told me that, that I would always listen to him and try to find a solution if I could - getting upset and angry like that just meant everyone got upset and angry and no solution could be found. He seemed to understand. Up to now I have not pushed things like getting the psychiatrist to come and speak to the school in a meeting, which she is willing to do. Partly because I don't want to make J different from the others and partily because I don't have full confidence that they would really understand even after that and implement changes such as not punishing him all the time. We are getting to the heart of the matter... what do you do when people don't know anything about ADHD (or whatever) and don't really want to know? Yes, there is a law here as elsewhere that children with differences have to be accommodated but in practice... It becomes clearer that another, more human system is probably going to be better for us all but J does also need to learn to read and write, etc... I do have to take a decision about all this, obviously. Where is the place, is there a place, where J's differences and difficulties can be viewed with understanding, tolerance and compassion rather than incomprehension, intolerance and judgement? Which is probably the 64,000 dollar question for us all. [/QUOTE]
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