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<blockquote data-quote="KTMom91" data-source="post: 710890" data-attributes="member: 4040"><p>He's 18. Maybe he just has to learn things the hard way. Both Son #1 and Son #2 made these bold, independent statements but absolutely hated it when we agreed and went on about our lives. Son #1 has a major tantrum right before his 19th birthday, telling Hubby (his father) to "forget him, forget everything, forget you ever had a son." All righty then. We didn't call to wish him a happy birthday. He was FURIOUS. Son #2 decided he didn't want to be part of the family any longer. I think he was 17. No problem. He lasted about three days of no one talking to him, acknowledging his presence in any way, and I only cooked for me, Hubby, and Miss KT. We got home one afternoon and he was perched on the roof like an owl. He decided to come down and talk to us. Miss KT didn't try it, since she saw first hand the results from her stepbrothers.</p><p></p><p>I tell the stories to frame what we told the boys. You're either in or you're out. You don't get both. You can't expect to have to benefits of being part of the family if you don't suck it up and get through the not so pleasant times. If you decide to be out, we'll be here when you decide you want to come back in. It's not fun, but they have to learn that it's not all about them. </p><p></p><p>Good luck. Stay strong.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="KTMom91, post: 710890, member: 4040"] He's 18. Maybe he just has to learn things the hard way. Both Son #1 and Son #2 made these bold, independent statements but absolutely hated it when we agreed and went on about our lives. Son #1 has a major tantrum right before his 19th birthday, telling Hubby (his father) to "forget him, forget everything, forget you ever had a son." All righty then. We didn't call to wish him a happy birthday. He was FURIOUS. Son #2 decided he didn't want to be part of the family any longer. I think he was 17. No problem. He lasted about three days of no one talking to him, acknowledging his presence in any way, and I only cooked for me, Hubby, and Miss KT. We got home one afternoon and he was perched on the roof like an owl. He decided to come down and talk to us. Miss KT didn't try it, since she saw first hand the results from her stepbrothers. I tell the stories to frame what we told the boys. You're either in or you're out. You don't get both. You can't expect to have to benefits of being part of the family if you don't suck it up and get through the not so pleasant times. If you decide to be out, we'll be here when you decide you want to come back in. It's not fun, but they have to learn that it's not all about them. Good luck. Stay strong. [/QUOTE]
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