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Picking up wee from school yet again.
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<blockquote data-quote="Shari" data-source="post: 341224" data-attributes="member: 1848"><p>Today is day 10. Judging from incidents at the last IEP meeting, tho, they don't want a manifestation hearing. </p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>Exactly. And expecting him to sit and cool off is bogus, to me. And exactly why he needs 1 person with him instead of popping in and out all day long. If Malory comes after him 4 times in the morning before I leave, no one else knows that... and if someone tells him he's stupid on the playground, and then he doesn't get picked for a game in gym, and then explodes, its not til after the fact that everyone knows the whole story of what happened thru the day leading up to it... </p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>My thoughts exactly. But, again, they "can't" assign him one para all day long, becuase when that para isn't needed, she is "wasting her time" staing with Wee...and the am para does bus duty at another building, so she doesn't arrive til 8:10 or so...</p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>No. If he makes it to specials, we rarely have problems after that.</p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>I agree. School does not because they "can't provide it, they don't have staff" (same excuse for para). Ps - most para's have no training. They aren't included in the IEP nor have they ever seen the thing. Or the full BIP.</p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>Realizing his motor planning problems on MOnday and this have been a huge blow to me this week, too. I rarely cry. I have all week this week. </p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>This is the only school in district. And SpEd Teacher is the autism consultant for the entire district, so she's required in all buildings.</p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>Actually, Wee works really hard TO hold it together, and it is only when things pile up that he loses it. He was doing GREAT til we threw massive schedule changes at him back in November. Even handling Malory, who was actively targeting him daily. The schedule changes were the straw that broke the camel's back, so to speak, And its never been "normal" since. </p><p> </p><p>And I don't think they've done all they can do. It was recommended right off the bat that he have a 1:1 with him all day. That has never been provided...he's got someone responsible for watching him at all times, but its not one person. Even tho there's now "only 2 paras", he flits in and out between 9 different "over-seers" each day. How are they to know where Wee's at to be able to help him?</p><p> </p><p>I agree its not fair to keep sending him. Its the only school in the district and they are requred by law to educate him. Its a catch 22.</p><p> </p><p>I want to send him, say "see you at 3" and turn off the phone. Make them deal with him and figure it out...either get the staff in place to deal, or decide to send him somewhere else. But, remember, this is the school who's idea of "dealing with him" for the entire last semester last year was to stick him in a 6x10 concrete supply closet 3 or 4 times a day....so, what does it continue to do to Wee to allow that to happen more? </p><p> </p><p>I will gladly move if someone cal tell me where to go that CAN do what he needs. I'll quit my job and move and work at a gas station. I don't care.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>Wee wasn't hitting anything with a chair. He was sitting in a chair banging his head and fists on the wall and the window beside the chair. Had he been using a chair, yes, I would agree with you. He wasn't. If they are truly concerned a 7 year old can put his fist thru the tempered glass of the brand new school building, well...that's another issue...but I don't think its unreasonable to expect this principal, who has willingly offered to attempt to be a "safe place" for Wee, to at least offer an alternative activity before going directly to physical, which everyone KNOWS how that will end. </p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>I agree.</p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>He has since returned to "normal"...that was a week from hel*, not typical with him. </p><p> </p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p><span style="color: #2e2e2e"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">I'm sure there's more I can do, but I don't know what it is or how to pay for it. </span></span></p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p><span style="color: #2e2e2e"><span style="font-family: 'Verdana'">Have they? With no true full-time para assigned? And a BIP that's routinely not followed (first action when Wee gets agitated is offer alternative activity....anyone see an alternative activity besides sitting in a chair? He went to the principal's office becuase the principal <em>wants</em> to be that go-to person. Great. But that would mean I'd expect him to follow what's outlined in the plan.) The SpEd teacher routinely gets upset wth others who should KNOW the plan not following it. Worksheets and writing tasks were to be removed from his curriculum per the speech language pathologist who diagnosed his dyslexia - asking him to do things he's not yet capable of doiing adds to his frustration - yet he brings home worksheets about every night. They played a SPELLING game in gym...with a dyslexic ED kid with a history of explosiveness who has preK academic skills...</span></span></p><p> </p><p>But the SpEd teacher thinks they've just made amazing progress this year, since he didn't have problems til December...</p><p> </p><p>I don't expect them to be perfect...but I do expect them to realize "you know, that was a bad idea..." and not just punish Wee for it by further removing him from school. Where's the adults' accountability here??</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Agreed. But aside from moving him to yet another school and taking yet another crapshoot as to whether or not they'll be able to deal with him...what do I do?</p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>This is where I'm at, too. I'm not sure how to proceed, but I think the days of friendly team-work are over. Because once you bring in the word "law" and "lawyer", its been my experience that tensions rise...</p><p> </p><p></p><p> </p><p>He is due for a draw, but I am in contact with his DevPed monthly, at least, and we tweak based on behaviors because we've finally learned that his "therapeutic levels" are not the norm. We reduced Depakote in the fall, and have increased it again about 3 weeks ago.</p><p> </p><p>Other than the one realy bad week at home, tho, he's entirely manageable. The 2nd opinion doctor in OK and the speech pathologist who did a full day of dyslexia testing on him last fall both just don't see why the school has any trouble with him at all...he has to be "managed", but he is "manageable".</p><p> </p><p>I have tried all I know to try. I have told them what I think he needs and he gets pieces of it, but its obviously not enough. He feels like a complete failure and they just keep reinforcing that. I am absolutely at wit's end, and ready to scream. I fully expect them to not call the manifestation hearing, even tho today is day 10. But once I get my bearings a bit, I plan to. I just don't know what more to ask for from them...principal wants to help, but he doesn't see the consequences of his actions, and if you only interact with Wee once a week, when he's already off, how's he ever going to figure that out? I think he's not a good player to be the additional safe person. He's got too many other things to worry about. </p><p> </p><p>I'm rambling. I'll shut up now.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Shari, post: 341224, member: 1848"] Today is day 10. Judging from incidents at the last IEP meeting, tho, they don't want a manifestation hearing. Exactly. And expecting him to sit and cool off is bogus, to me. And exactly why he needs 1 person with him instead of popping in and out all day long. If Malory comes after him 4 times in the morning before I leave, no one else knows that... and if someone tells him he's stupid on the playground, and then he doesn't get picked for a game in gym, and then explodes, its not til after the fact that everyone knows the whole story of what happened thru the day leading up to it... My thoughts exactly. But, again, they "can't" assign him one para all day long, becuase when that para isn't needed, she is "wasting her time" staing with Wee...and the am para does bus duty at another building, so she doesn't arrive til 8:10 or so... No. If he makes it to specials, we rarely have problems after that. I agree. School does not because they "can't provide it, they don't have staff" (same excuse for para). Ps - most para's have no training. They aren't included in the IEP nor have they ever seen the thing. Or the full BIP. Realizing his motor planning problems on MOnday and this have been a huge blow to me this week, too. I rarely cry. I have all week this week. This is the only school in district. And SpEd Teacher is the autism consultant for the entire district, so she's required in all buildings. Actually, Wee works really hard TO hold it together, and it is only when things pile up that he loses it. He was doing GREAT til we threw massive schedule changes at him back in November. Even handling Malory, who was actively targeting him daily. The schedule changes were the straw that broke the camel's back, so to speak, And its never been "normal" since. And I don't think they've done all they can do. It was recommended right off the bat that he have a 1:1 with him all day. That has never been provided...he's got someone responsible for watching him at all times, but its not one person. Even tho there's now "only 2 paras", he flits in and out between 9 different "over-seers" each day. How are they to know where Wee's at to be able to help him? I agree its not fair to keep sending him. Its the only school in the district and they are requred by law to educate him. Its a catch 22. I want to send him, say "see you at 3" and turn off the phone. Make them deal with him and figure it out...either get the staff in place to deal, or decide to send him somewhere else. But, remember, this is the school who's idea of "dealing with him" for the entire last semester last year was to stick him in a 6x10 concrete supply closet 3 or 4 times a day....so, what does it continue to do to Wee to allow that to happen more? I will gladly move if someone cal tell me where to go that CAN do what he needs. I'll quit my job and move and work at a gas station. I don't care. Wee wasn't hitting anything with a chair. He was sitting in a chair banging his head and fists on the wall and the window beside the chair. Had he been using a chair, yes, I would agree with you. He wasn't. If they are truly concerned a 7 year old can put his fist thru the tempered glass of the brand new school building, well...that's another issue...but I don't think its unreasonable to expect this principal, who has willingly offered to attempt to be a "safe place" for Wee, to at least offer an alternative activity before going directly to physical, which everyone KNOWS how that will end. I agree. He has since returned to "normal"...that was a week from hel*, not typical with him. [COLOR=#2e2e2e][FONT=Verdana][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=#2e2e2e][FONT=Verdana]I'm sure there's more I can do, but I don't know what it is or how to pay for it. [/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=#2e2e2e][FONT=Verdana][/FONT][/COLOR] [COLOR=#2e2e2e][FONT=Verdana]Have they? With no true full-time para assigned? And a BIP that's routinely not followed (first action when Wee gets agitated is offer alternative activity....anyone see an alternative activity besides sitting in a chair? He went to the principal's office becuase the principal [I]wants[/I] to be that go-to person. Great. But that would mean I'd expect him to follow what's outlined in the plan.) The SpEd teacher routinely gets upset wth others who should KNOW the plan not following it. Worksheets and writing tasks were to be removed from his curriculum per the speech language pathologist who diagnosed his dyslexia - asking him to do things he's not yet capable of doiing adds to his frustration - yet he brings home worksheets about every night. They played a SPELLING game in gym...with a dyslexic ED kid with a history of explosiveness who has preK academic skills...[/FONT][/COLOR] But the SpEd teacher thinks they've just made amazing progress this year, since he didn't have problems til December... I don't expect them to be perfect...but I do expect them to realize "you know, that was a bad idea..." and not just punish Wee for it by further removing him from school. Where's the adults' accountability here?? [COLOR=#2e2e2e][FONT=Verdana] [/FONT][/COLOR] Agreed. But aside from moving him to yet another school and taking yet another crapshoot as to whether or not they'll be able to deal with him...what do I do? [COLOR=#2e2e2e][FONT=Verdana][/FONT][/COLOR] This is where I'm at, too. I'm not sure how to proceed, but I think the days of friendly team-work are over. Because once you bring in the word "law" and "lawyer", its been my experience that tensions rise... He is due for a draw, but I am in contact with his DevPed monthly, at least, and we tweak based on behaviors because we've finally learned that his "therapeutic levels" are not the norm. We reduced Depakote in the fall, and have increased it again about 3 weeks ago. Other than the one realy bad week at home, tho, he's entirely manageable. The 2nd opinion doctor in OK and the speech pathologist who did a full day of dyslexia testing on him last fall both just don't see why the school has any trouble with him at all...he has to be "managed", but he is "manageable". I have tried all I know to try. I have told them what I think he needs and he gets pieces of it, but its obviously not enough. He feels like a complete failure and they just keep reinforcing that. I am absolutely at wit's end, and ready to scream. I fully expect them to not call the manifestation hearing, even tho today is day 10. But once I get my bearings a bit, I plan to. I just don't know what more to ask for from them...principal wants to help, but he doesn't see the consequences of his actions, and if you only interact with Wee once a week, when he's already off, how's he ever going to figure that out? I think he's not a good player to be the additional safe person. He's got too many other things to worry about. I'm rambling. I'll shut up now. [/QUOTE]
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