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<blockquote data-quote="SeekingStrength" data-source="post: 644810" data-attributes="member: 17635"><p>Shan,</p><p></p><p>This is great. You can keep this going. Put yourself first.</p><p></p><p>A good friend of mine has a husband who sounds much like yours. I heard her stories for years and it was difficult to hear. He was/is very controlling. They are still married, but the dynamics changed when she just quit caring.</p><p></p><p>She would get money out of the ATM and he would call her at work, furious. For years, she never did that. HE told her what she could spend for decades. She turned her paycheck over to him and he gave her an "allowance". She had to ask for any extra money.</p><p></p><p>One day, she decided to did not have to live like that. She told me about it weeks later. Like you, she brought more money into the family than he.</p><p></p><p>Though I THINK I would walk away from her marriage, I certainly do not know. I do know this. Once she stopped listening to his rules, putting up with his tirades, she is much happier. While I would not to be in that relationship, it is a bit more equal than it was for years and years.</p><p></p><p>Again, it seemed to happen after she just quit caring about his "rules". I think he treats her with a bit more respect these days.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SeekingStrength, post: 644810, member: 17635"] Shan, This is great. You can keep this going. Put yourself first. A good friend of mine has a husband who sounds much like yours. I heard her stories for years and it was difficult to hear. He was/is very controlling. They are still married, but the dynamics changed when she just quit caring. She would get money out of the ATM and he would call her at work, furious. For years, she never did that. HE told her what she could spend for decades. She turned her paycheck over to him and he gave her an "allowance". She had to ask for any extra money. One day, she decided to did not have to live like that. She told me about it weeks later. Like you, she brought more money into the family than he. Though I THINK I would walk away from her marriage, I certainly do not know. I do know this. Once she stopped listening to his rules, putting up with his tirades, she is much happier. While I would not to be in that relationship, it is a bit more equal than it was for years and years. Again, it seemed to happen after she just quit caring about his "rules". I think he treats her with a bit more respect these days. [/QUOTE]
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