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The Watercooler
Please keep this friendly and light...To spank or not to spank?
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<blockquote data-quote="HaoZi" data-source="post: 591117" data-attributes="member: 15793"><p>Oh boy...</p><p>When she was little I didn't really need to spank. A swat on a diapered behind or hand for safety issues would stop her in the moment, but a raised voice actually worked better and she listened to "No" back then, and it stuck.</p><p></p><p>As she got older, bolder, and her issues started coming out but without knowing what was wrong, I did spank more often, as time-outs didn't work for me. Did I spank in frustration or anger at times? Yes, and I regret those.</p><p></p><p>Lately the only times I've spanked (as she is bigger now, much bigger!) is when she's gone after me physically and hit me first and repeatedly. When she won't stop her physical attack and let me walk away I will swat her on the behind if I can't restrain her, because that does get her attention and jerk her back when words don't do the trick.</p><p></p><p>As a general rule, I'd say there's a difference between discipline and abuse, and spanking a child depends on whether it stops the behavior that needs to be stopped (safety issues) in the moment, and/or if the child learns something constructive from it. If all the child learns from it is that hitting is a proper form of behavior or to be more sneaky with their behavior, then it's not the right form of discipline for that child. Overuse of spanking does no good either, as it shouldn't be the only form of correction. If the child gets the same punishment for everything they do wrong, they might as well do wrong BIG, eh?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="HaoZi, post: 591117, member: 15793"] Oh boy... When she was little I didn't really need to spank. A swat on a diapered behind or hand for safety issues would stop her in the moment, but a raised voice actually worked better and she listened to "No" back then, and it stuck. As she got older, bolder, and her issues started coming out but without knowing what was wrong, I did spank more often, as time-outs didn't work for me. Did I spank in frustration or anger at times? Yes, and I regret those. Lately the only times I've spanked (as she is bigger now, much bigger!) is when she's gone after me physically and hit me first and repeatedly. When she won't stop her physical attack and let me walk away I will swat her on the behind if I can't restrain her, because that does get her attention and jerk her back when words don't do the trick. As a general rule, I'd say there's a difference between discipline and abuse, and spanking a child depends on whether it stops the behavior that needs to be stopped (safety issues) in the moment, and/or if the child learns something constructive from it. If all the child learns from it is that hitting is a proper form of behavior or to be more sneaky with their behavior, then it's not the right form of discipline for that child. Overuse of spanking does no good either, as it shouldn't be the only form of correction. If the child gets the same punishment for everything they do wrong, they might as well do wrong BIG, eh? [/QUOTE]
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Please keep this friendly and light...To spank or not to spank?
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