Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
prayers
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 731483" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>tryingtobestrong....I agree with the other posters........however, I also remember quite clearly when I was in the throes of my own enabling issues that seeing my way clear out of a situation where I thought I could save my daughter was very, very difficult. I imagine you believe if you don't help your son, do it all for him once he finds out his partner is leaving, that he will fall into a deep pit you not only won't be able to remove him from, but in the end, whatever happens, you will feel it is your fault, that you should have done more. We parents seem to have no end to the level of help we offer our adult troubled kids.</p><p></p><p>Right now, you are doing what you believe to be the best thing for your son.....none of us can fault you for that, many of us have been there many, many times. Many of us have tried, and tried, and tried to save our kids only to discover, sometimes years in, that all of our help did not do what we intended and in many cases, it prolonged the problem. </p><p></p><p>I hear that you are earnestly, willingly and ready to do whatever it takes to help your son. Perhaps he will agree to Rehab and everything you want for him. Or he won't. Either way you have to do what your heart can bear.....as all of us do. </p><p></p><p>We're not judging you. We understand how difficult this is. We're attempting to offer a different perspective which we have found through our own journeys through this maze. However, you know your son and we don't. Perhaps this time it will be different and he will begin the process of healing. I hope that's the case. If it is, or it isn't the case, please continue posting....we're here to support you with whatever choices you make. This stuff is hard. We generally go all over the map before we find a place we can stand that feels right.</p><p></p><p>At some point, if you want to detach from your son's choices and behaviors, you may want to look into getting professional support, perhaps a therapist or 12 step groups like Al Anon or Families Anonymous. You might try reading the article on detachment at the bottom of my post here.</p><p></p><p>Hang in there tryingtobestrong......you're not alone.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 731483, member: 13542"] tryingtobestrong....I agree with the other posters........however, I also remember quite clearly when I was in the throes of my own enabling issues that seeing my way clear out of a situation where I thought I could save my daughter was very, very difficult. I imagine you believe if you don't help your son, do it all for him once he finds out his partner is leaving, that he will fall into a deep pit you not only won't be able to remove him from, but in the end, whatever happens, you will feel it is your fault, that you should have done more. We parents seem to have no end to the level of help we offer our adult troubled kids. Right now, you are doing what you believe to be the best thing for your son.....none of us can fault you for that, many of us have been there many, many times. Many of us have tried, and tried, and tried to save our kids only to discover, sometimes years in, that all of our help did not do what we intended and in many cases, it prolonged the problem. I hear that you are earnestly, willingly and ready to do whatever it takes to help your son. Perhaps he will agree to Rehab and everything you want for him. Or he won't. Either way you have to do what your heart can bear.....as all of us do. We're not judging you. We understand how difficult this is. We're attempting to offer a different perspective which we have found through our own journeys through this maze. However, you know your son and we don't. Perhaps this time it will be different and he will begin the process of healing. I hope that's the case. If it is, or it isn't the case, please continue posting....we're here to support you with whatever choices you make. This stuff is hard. We generally go all over the map before we find a place we can stand that feels right. At some point, if you want to detach from your son's choices and behaviors, you may want to look into getting professional support, perhaps a therapist or 12 step groups like Al Anon or Families Anonymous. You might try reading the article on detachment at the bottom of my post here. Hang in there tryingtobestrong......you're not alone. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
prayers
Top