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Did girlfriend go to court? in my opinion you need court to establish paternity (since unmarried they may require a test for Son and you also to get any rights or a parenting schedule.) Any decision you make out of court is not legal and girlfriend can decide to move across the country without telling you. I strongly suggest doing this in court as a discussion at home holds no legal teeth. Written documents between you don't either. You can only make it stick in court.

Good luck to you