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Psychiatrists ponder the dangers of bitterness
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<blockquote data-quote="gcvmom" data-source="post: 276728" data-attributes="member: 3444"><p>in my opinion, at least for the two people I know who fit this description, something happened to them during an important developmental time where they were hurt very badly emotionally. For my dad, it was probably being bounced around foster homes from age 4 to his teens, knowing that he wasn't wanted by his parents and never really having a stable and positive force in his life -- no one person who nurtured and cared for him.</p><p> </p><p>For sister in law#2, it was growing up in a dysfunctional home and being essentially left on her own to care for my husband and younger sister while her mom travelled the world with her older sister and dad worked two and three jobs. She felt abandoned and it still shows today with many of the issues she has. No one, not an aunt, not a grandmother, took her under their wing and provided that source of nurturing she needed during those years (she was in her very early teens when mom took off and she was left to run the house). </p><p> </p><p>But I ALSO think that when stuff like this happens to people who are predisposed to mental illness or even personality disorders, those problems are triggered and are harder to overcome without heavy-duty counseling. Most people just don't see things for what they are, and they don't want to admit they have a problem that can be helped. Too much stigma. And it's much easier to wallow in the victim mentality than to face the painful past, deal with it, and move on.</p><p> </p><p>Just my two, teeny, tiny cents. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite7" alt=":p" title="Stick Out Tongue :p" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":p" /></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="gcvmom, post: 276728, member: 3444"] in my opinion, at least for the two people I know who fit this description, something happened to them during an important developmental time where they were hurt very badly emotionally. For my dad, it was probably being bounced around foster homes from age 4 to his teens, knowing that he wasn't wanted by his parents and never really having a stable and positive force in his life -- no one person who nurtured and cared for him. For sister in law#2, it was growing up in a dysfunctional home and being essentially left on her own to care for my husband and younger sister while her mom travelled the world with her older sister and dad worked two and three jobs. She felt abandoned and it still shows today with many of the issues she has. No one, not an aunt, not a grandmother, took her under their wing and provided that source of nurturing she needed during those years (she was in her very early teens when mom took off and she was left to run the house). But I ALSO think that when stuff like this happens to people who are predisposed to mental illness or even personality disorders, those problems are triggered and are harder to overcome without heavy-duty counseling. Most people just don't see things for what they are, and they don't want to admit they have a problem that can be helped. Too much stigma. And it's much easier to wallow in the victim mentality than to face the painful past, deal with it, and move on. Just my two, teeny, tiny cents. :p [/QUOTE]
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Psychiatrists ponder the dangers of bitterness
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