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Carolanne,

Sorry to say, but a lot of their actions just come because of their ages. I so disliked my daughter at that age.  They are testing the boundaries now, as they should be. You say you can't take away the trip because you've already paid, that's not true---you can still take it and lose the money---me---I would look forward to the break.  I know that gfgd has caused a lot of stress in the family. Are the others in counseling to deal with what has happened?  Sometimes the stress of a situation weighs heavily on adolescents and they don't even realize it.  What I did was Shut the bedroom door.  The mess had to stay in her room---and if it came out into the common areas---it got thrown away---yes, even good clothes and shoes.  I refused to buy anything new until she took care of what she had.  I tried to find ways to spend quality time with her or my oldest son away from the drama that difficult child caused.


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