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Raising PCs When You Have a difficult child in the family
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<blockquote data-quote="Liahona" data-source="post: 598762"><p>This is something I struggle with. I really don't think my pcs would be called easy child in a different family. Everyone has tons of needs and autistic traits; Ann just threw a 2 day fit over making her bed. My difficult children being the older ones makes it so the pcs don't know life any differently, but it also means I don't have an older easy child to help meet the needs of the younger pcs; like other large families do. I have to try to get the difficult children to help with some of the needs of the pcs. It can be very frustrating for pcs and difficult children, but my autistic rigid little boys are starting to be able to see the needs of their sisters; especially difficult child 3 and difficult child 1. I've had almost everyone in therapy at some point over this issue as well. This issue affects Elsie the most and she wants more of my time and wants to be the baby. So I try to cuddle her more and let her have sippies and a baby spoon. I call her baby princess and she smiles and laughs. It helps that difficult child 1 goes to school and visitations, and that everyone else homeschools. The homeschooling makes me spend one on one time with each of them everyday. It also eliminates some of the social issues they would encounter at school (they can still be plenty mean to each other as siblings though, it doesn't get rid of all issues.) They do play very well together though. We don't go lots of places because I have to have backup where ever I go, and this does effect the kids. I know difficult child 2 is jealous of the programs difficult child 1 is in; all of the rewards and fun places, and difficult child 1 is jealous of difficult child 2 staying home. </p><p></p><p>I also try to limit the appointments and tdocs we go to. This has not made me popular with some of them. I can not do everything they suggest and they seem to think that unless I do everything they say the difficult child they treat won't make it in life. They don't always see what they are suggesting will do to the whole family. Others are better at it and more reasonable.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Liahona, post: 598762"] This is something I struggle with. I really don't think my pcs would be called easy child in a different family. Everyone has tons of needs and autistic traits; Ann just threw a 2 day fit over making her bed. My difficult children being the older ones makes it so the pcs don't know life any differently, but it also means I don't have an older easy child to help meet the needs of the younger pcs; like other large families do. I have to try to get the difficult children to help with some of the needs of the pcs. It can be very frustrating for pcs and difficult children, but my autistic rigid little boys are starting to be able to see the needs of their sisters; especially difficult child 3 and difficult child 1. I've had almost everyone in therapy at some point over this issue as well. This issue affects Elsie the most and she wants more of my time and wants to be the baby. So I try to cuddle her more and let her have sippies and a baby spoon. I call her baby princess and she smiles and laughs. It helps that difficult child 1 goes to school and visitations, and that everyone else homeschools. The homeschooling makes me spend one on one time with each of them everyday. It also eliminates some of the social issues they would encounter at school (they can still be plenty mean to each other as siblings though, it doesn't get rid of all issues.) They do play very well together though. We don't go lots of places because I have to have backup where ever I go, and this does effect the kids. I know difficult child 2 is jealous of the programs difficult child 1 is in; all of the rewards and fun places, and difficult child 1 is jealous of difficult child 2 staying home. I also try to limit the appointments and tdocs we go to. This has not made me popular with some of them. I can not do everything they suggest and they seem to think that unless I do everything they say the difficult child they treat won't make it in life. They don't always see what they are suggesting will do to the whole family. Others are better at it and more reasonable. [/QUOTE]
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