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General Parenting
re: How do you discipline your children?
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<blockquote data-quote="Allan-Matlem" data-source="post: 426993" data-attributes="member: 10"><p>Our differences of opinion stem from our understanding and interpretation of kids behavior , how kids learn and become self motivated.</p><p></p><p>Consequences don't teach lacking skills and cause kids to resist. The kids here would not have behaved to get the car ( because they don't have the skills) . They would steal your car , get their friends to damage your car , break into your house , bully your kids or just prefer to forgo the perks or be grounded just to make sure you can't control them . Control by seduction is the other side of the same coin, which does not buy much.</p><p></p><p>I doubt whether your relative was using CPS and my understanding of CPS is rather different to the way you present it.</p><p></p><p>The vindication of the approach is that the Behaviorists are moving away from consequences , ' honey catches more flies than vinegar , the overwhelming research that extrinsic motivation may get short term results but in the long term undermines intrinsic motivation , Douglas Riley , the author of the defiant child comes out with a new book " what your explosive child is trying to tell you " a rather different book from the first book , treatment centers that have the structure to impose and follow through on consequences which parents lack are moving away from them and then take a look at the prisons - 2/3 are in their 2nd term , juvie detention centers are failures.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Allan-Matlem, post: 426993, member: 10"] Our differences of opinion stem from our understanding and interpretation of kids behavior , how kids learn and become self motivated. Consequences don't teach lacking skills and cause kids to resist. The kids here would not have behaved to get the car ( because they don't have the skills) . They would steal your car , get their friends to damage your car , break into your house , bully your kids or just prefer to forgo the perks or be grounded just to make sure you can't control them . Control by seduction is the other side of the same coin, which does not buy much. I doubt whether your relative was using CPS and my understanding of CPS is rather different to the way you present it. The vindication of the approach is that the Behaviorists are moving away from consequences , ' honey catches more flies than vinegar , the overwhelming research that extrinsic motivation may get short term results but in the long term undermines intrinsic motivation , Douglas Riley , the author of the defiant child comes out with a new book " what your explosive child is trying to tell you " a rather different book from the first book , treatment centers that have the structure to impose and follow through on consequences which parents lack are moving away from them and then take a look at the prisons - 2/3 are in their 2nd term , juvie detention centers are failures. [/QUOTE]
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re: How do you discipline your children?
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