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<blockquote data-quote="GuideMe" data-source="post: 642643" data-attributes="member: 18233"><p>Great idea. I think that is most likely what I am going to do.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Another great idea. This just becomes another problem because both oldest nephews parents are extremely controlling. Their lives are so complicated it's ridiculous. They each want to spend as much time with their son (being as though they have split custody) so they rarely allow him to go anywhere or with anyone else. I have huge problem with that because it's not fair to him and it's not fair to me. Only if they need babysitting which is where I of course came in</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Nope, not at all. Lil, I can lay my head down at night with a clear conscience regarding this issue because I went above and beyond for middle nephew for many years. In fact, there was a point where I would show way more attention to him than oldest nephew. I never, ever, treated them any differently. However, I guess the last straw finally broke the camels back recently and this goes into what MWM said</p><p> My brother and sis are not nice to most people and they are like this with each other more than anyone else, which is why it creates such a toxic environment. They don't care who's around. Now people feel the same way about nephews which the oldest is very loved by everyone. ( A by note, oldest nephew really is as you can say, extremely handsome, popular, athletic, smart, kind and is the son everyone wants to have. He's the all american poster boy). Peeps have complained about the middle child. However, I can say with the same confidence that ALL of them tried their best to treat middle nephew and oldest nephew <strong><em><u>the same.</u></em></strong> When middle nephew was born and through his years, I was very impressed that my brothers circle of friends and piers treated middle nephew with the same love and regard that they did oldest nephew even though they were by different mothers. My middle nephew was very lucky and very blessed to have this, wouldn't you say? He got instant popularity with no questions. Not one person treated him differently and he too is very handsome, athletic, even smarter than oldest nephew. Middle nephew is extremely smart. The only difference is oldest nephew is kind and loving and middle nephew, for lack of better words, can be a mean little jerk. However, I have been hearing through the grapevine that some people already have been complaining about middle nephews behavior. So you're right MWM, it's just not me see's all of this, it just effects me the most because I am the blood relative. I can say with confidence that middle nephew is out-casting his own self with his own behavior and is just like his mother. Again I say, people went out of their way to treat my brothers new girlfriend and their son with the same love, same kindness and fodness like they did with my brothers first girlfriend and oldest son. I think more people are aware these days and what out of their way to make sure middle nephew felt loved, welcome and no different than oldest nephew. </p><p></p><p>On a side note: This must be said. I don't know where or how this fits into the story but it does. Oldest nephew and middle nephew are ALWAYS in <strong><em><u>fierce</u></em></strong> competition with each other. It has gotten completely out of hand in my opinion. They get jealous over each other and that most smallest of things and make each other miserable. I think my brother chalked it up to "eh, brothers will be brothers", but at this point it has morphed into something else. I don't know how they got like this or where it came from, they are FIVE YEARS apart in age, but my god, EVERYTHING and ANYTHING is a competition. You can't go spend time with them without hearing "I can do this BETTER than you. I got more and better awards than you. I got more black belts than you. I got more trophies than you. I can do this better, better, better than you!" or whatever it is they choose to argue about, every other minute! Oh and god for bid you are spending time with them, they will fight to the end for your attention and it's so not necessary because they both get loads of attention. I don't know where this come from! It's so ridiculous! To be honest, I think middle nephew started this whole thing. He loves to upset people and I use to catch him when he was younger torturing my oldest nephew like he does with me as well. As I said, middle nephew has a VERY high IQ. You would not think you were dealing with a little kid when dealing with him. He is beyond his years. He already is the smartest kid in his class and I predicted that a long time ago. Everyone tells me "wow, you were so right". The things middle nephew says would blow all of your minds. It's totally mind blowing how smart he is, how he can read you, how he can read a situation with such accuracy. He is using his powers for evil, lol lol. Had to make a funny.</p><p></p><p></p><p>Yes, a lot of their behavior are having a direct impact on kids. This just dawned on me and I feel silly for not thinking of it before, maybe my brother puts so much emphasis on being the best, maybe he is making them feel like they are not going to be loved if they don't accomplish great things. <sigh> I could really choke my brother right now. My brother is all about that kind of stuff and the "I am better than all of you attitude" I am going to tell my nephews next time they go at it "I don't care how many awards, trophies, grades or karate belts you have. I love both of you regardless of all of that. You all could have nothing and be dumb as rocks, AND I would still LOVE you the SAME and EQUALLY"</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>Oh yeah, they use to be hear ALL the time because I would babysit them while their parents worked. He did act better and there are a lot of times when he was really well behaved, I can't take that away from him.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="GuideMe, post: 642643, member: 18233"] Great idea. I think that is most likely what I am going to do. Another great idea. This just becomes another problem because both oldest nephews parents are extremely controlling. Their lives are so complicated it's ridiculous. They each want to spend as much time with their son (being as though they have split custody) so they rarely allow him to go anywhere or with anyone else. I have huge problem with that because it's not fair to him and it's not fair to me. Only if they need babysitting which is where I of course came in Nope, not at all. Lil, I can lay my head down at night with a clear conscience regarding this issue because I went above and beyond for middle nephew for many years. In fact, there was a point where I would show way more attention to him than oldest nephew. I never, ever, treated them any differently. However, I guess the last straw finally broke the camels back recently and this goes into what MWM said My brother and sis are not nice to most people and they are like this with each other more than anyone else, which is why it creates such a toxic environment. They don't care who's around. Now people feel the same way about nephews which the oldest is very loved by everyone. ( A by note, oldest nephew really is as you can say, extremely handsome, popular, athletic, smart, kind and is the son everyone wants to have. He's the all american poster boy). Peeps have complained about the middle child. However, I can say with the same confidence that ALL of them tried their best to treat middle nephew and oldest nephew [B][I][U]the same.[/U][/I][/B] When middle nephew was born and through his years, I was very impressed that my brothers circle of friends and piers treated middle nephew with the same love and regard that they did oldest nephew even though they were by different mothers. My middle nephew was very lucky and very blessed to have this, wouldn't you say? He got instant popularity with no questions. Not one person treated him differently and he too is very handsome, athletic, even smarter than oldest nephew. Middle nephew is extremely smart. The only difference is oldest nephew is kind and loving and middle nephew, for lack of better words, can be a mean little jerk. However, I have been hearing through the grapevine that some people already have been complaining about middle nephews behavior. So you're right MWM, it's just not me see's all of this, it just effects me the most because I am the blood relative. I can say with confidence that middle nephew is out-casting his own self with his own behavior and is just like his mother. Again I say, people went out of their way to treat my brothers new girlfriend and their son with the same love, same kindness and fodness like they did with my brothers first girlfriend and oldest son. I think more people are aware these days and what out of their way to make sure middle nephew felt loved, welcome and no different than oldest nephew. On a side note: This must be said. I don't know where or how this fits into the story but it does. Oldest nephew and middle nephew are ALWAYS in [B][I][U]fierce[/U][/I][/B] competition with each other. It has gotten completely out of hand in my opinion. They get jealous over each other and that most smallest of things and make each other miserable. I think my brother chalked it up to "eh, brothers will be brothers", but at this point it has morphed into something else. I don't know how they got like this or where it came from, they are FIVE YEARS apart in age, but my god, EVERYTHING and ANYTHING is a competition. You can't go spend time with them without hearing "I can do this BETTER than you. I got more and better awards than you. I got more black belts than you. I got more trophies than you. I can do this better, better, better than you!" or whatever it is they choose to argue about, every other minute! Oh and god for bid you are spending time with them, they will fight to the end for your attention and it's so not necessary because they both get loads of attention. I don't know where this come from! It's so ridiculous! To be honest, I think middle nephew started this whole thing. He loves to upset people and I use to catch him when he was younger torturing my oldest nephew like he does with me as well. As I said, middle nephew has a VERY high IQ. You would not think you were dealing with a little kid when dealing with him. He is beyond his years. He already is the smartest kid in his class and I predicted that a long time ago. Everyone tells me "wow, you were so right". The things middle nephew says would blow all of your minds. It's totally mind blowing how smart he is, how he can read you, how he can read a situation with such accuracy. He is using his powers for evil, lol lol. Had to make a funny. Yes, a lot of their behavior are having a direct impact on kids. This just dawned on me and I feel silly for not thinking of it before, maybe my brother puts so much emphasis on being the best, maybe he is making them feel like they are not going to be loved if they don't accomplish great things. <sigh> I could really choke my brother right now. My brother is all about that kind of stuff and the "I am better than all of you attitude" I am going to tell my nephews next time they go at it "I don't care how many awards, trophies, grades or karate belts you have. I love both of you regardless of all of that. You all could have nothing and be dumb as rocks, AND I would still LOVE you the SAME and EQUALLY" Oh yeah, they use to be hear ALL the time because I would babysit them while their parents worked. He did act better and there are a lot of times when he was really well behaved, I can't take that away from him. . [/QUOTE]
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