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<blockquote data-quote="Beta" data-source="post: 751292" data-attributes="member: 22597"><p>Thank you all for your wise words. I tried twice today to contact the police officer from CIT (Crisis Intervention Team) but had to leave a voicemail. I'll keep trying. I really would like to forward the text messages to this gentleman and get his opinion. My therapist read his text messages, and she said they were classic for someone on drugs. </p><p></p><p>I told my sister last night, "You do <u>whatever </u>you have to do to be safe," and I meant it. Surprisingly, she is thinking that she and her husband will allow him to stay until after Christmas and be out by the first of the year. I just don't see that happening. I think he'll be gone before that. Her husband told mine that if Josh were to become violent, they will call the police and record his behavior on a phone as evidence. </p><p></p><p> I think I have reached a turning point. That's not to say that I don't hurt...it hurts like the dickens, but I've given 29 years of my life to this human being, and he cares nothing about me or my husband and has no gratitude or appreciation for anything that has been done for him. It's time to pick up the pieces of my life and start putting them back together again. To spend years in despair and crippling grief and continuing to enable would be to be irresponsible with the life God has given me. I have to keep reminding myself of that. I also have to stop the wishful thinking and the false belief that someone in there is the "real" Josh, if I can just find a way to reach down and pull him out. This is the real Josh, at least while he is untreated. He is not capable of loving or caring for anyone. </p><p>Josh is not planning on being in their home while I'm there, and don't believe he will show up, unless of course I'm offering him money, and even then, I think he would just insist I leave it behind rather than see me. I'm going with the goal of repairing my relationship with my sister and getting to know her (new) husband and her grandbaby. Once I've gone, I will know that I have truly done everything I could have done to try to help him and show him that I love him. </p><p></p><p>I agree about the intervention. I think it could be a good idea, but only if it was done by a professional, and only if he was given some pretty strong consequences for not consenting to be evaluated. I would never attempt to do something like that on our own.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Beta, post: 751292, member: 22597"] Thank you all for your wise words. I tried twice today to contact the police officer from CIT (Crisis Intervention Team) but had to leave a voicemail. I'll keep trying. I really would like to forward the text messages to this gentleman and get his opinion. My therapist read his text messages, and she said they were classic for someone on drugs. I told my sister last night, "You do [U]whatever [/U]you have to do to be safe," and I meant it. Surprisingly, she is thinking that she and her husband will allow him to stay until after Christmas and be out by the first of the year. I just don't see that happening. I think he'll be gone before that. Her husband told mine that if Josh were to become violent, they will call the police and record his behavior on a phone as evidence. I think I have reached a turning point. That's not to say that I don't hurt...it hurts like the dickens, but I've given 29 years of my life to this human being, and he cares nothing about me or my husband and has no gratitude or appreciation for anything that has been done for him. It's time to pick up the pieces of my life and start putting them back together again. To spend years in despair and crippling grief and continuing to enable would be to be irresponsible with the life God has given me. I have to keep reminding myself of that. I also have to stop the wishful thinking and the false belief that someone in there is the "real" Josh, if I can just find a way to reach down and pull him out. This is the real Josh, at least while he is untreated. He is not capable of loving or caring for anyone. Josh is not planning on being in their home while I'm there, and don't believe he will show up, unless of course I'm offering him money, and even then, I think he would just insist I leave it behind rather than see me. I'm going with the goal of repairing my relationship with my sister and getting to know her (new) husband and her grandbaby. Once I've gone, I will know that I have truly done everything I could have done to try to help him and show him that I love him. I agree about the intervention. I think it could be a good idea, but only if it was done by a professional, and only if he was given some pretty strong consequences for not consenting to be evaluated. I would never attempt to do something like that on our own. [/QUOTE]
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