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General Parenting
Resentment & Envy over easy child
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<blockquote data-quote="DaisyFace" data-source="post: 367846" data-attributes="member: 6546"><p>Doddlin--</p><p> </p><p>First of all--((((hugs))))</p><p>It definitely stinks to feel like the "green-eyed-monster"...even if it seems justified.</p><p> </p><p>Second--</p><p>I think you need to let it go.</p><p> </p><p>In my family, we had a few relatives that always seemed to get the "star" treatment...and I was left in the "what am I, chopped liver?" crowd. But, I soon realized that it was NOT the fault of the "star" that this was happening. I began to see that other dysfunctional relatives were allowing the "star" to dictate the family activities--and pretending that the "star"s successes were EVERYBODY's successes. Look--since the "star" has a new car, we can all celebrate having a new car. Look--since the "star" is getting a promotion, we can all celebrate getting a promotion. Since the "star" is visiting, we can all have a party.</p><p> </p><p>In a bizarre way, by making it all about the "star"--the family was living vicariously. Isn't she wonderful? Therefore, I must be wonderful because I am the "star"s relative. Success by association.</p><p> </p><p>I learned that I did not have to play by these rules....and when I stopped playing along--I felt better....and I began to resent the "stars" less and less.</p><p> </p><p>I think you should stop playing, too...and the green-eyed monster will probably just fade away.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="DaisyFace, post: 367846, member: 6546"] Doddlin-- First of all--((((hugs)))) It definitely stinks to feel like the "green-eyed-monster"...even if it seems justified. Second-- I think you need to let it go. In my family, we had a few relatives that always seemed to get the "star" treatment...and I was left in the "what am I, chopped liver?" crowd. But, I soon realized that it was NOT the fault of the "star" that this was happening. I began to see that other dysfunctional relatives were allowing the "star" to dictate the family activities--and pretending that the "star"s successes were EVERYBODY's successes. Look--since the "star" has a new car, we can all celebrate having a new car. Look--since the "star" is getting a promotion, we can all celebrate getting a promotion. Since the "star" is visiting, we can all have a party. In a bizarre way, by making it all about the "star"--the family was living vicariously. Isn't she wonderful? Therefore, I must be wonderful because I am the "star"s relative. Success by association. I learned that I did not have to play by these rules....and when I stopped playing along--I felt better....and I began to resent the "stars" less and less. I think you should stop playing, too...and the green-eyed monster will probably just fade away. [/QUOTE]
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Resentment & Envy over easy child
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