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InsaneCdn-  I agree, there is something there where he is not in his right mind, even while being calmly vindictive.  And maybe he doesn't know why he is doing it, there are many things in his early years (though they continue with Biomom) that would lead him down this path.  I've always struggled with the fact that he is so "perfect" with all other adults while out of our care.  (Except for Biomom... she frequently calls in a panic because he is misbehaving/hurting his little brother over there.)  I've attributed it to the fact that maybe he only does it at home with us because this is his safety zone and he can stop the act while he's here.  It's got to be pretty tiring keeping that up for so long at school and other places.