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Scared to death
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 623764" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Ok, I read the whole thing.</p><p></p><p>This child has obviously had a very hard time in his early years and I believe in my gut he has attachment disorder. Letting the dogs eat the toad alive then letting it live is very typical. The fires by grandma's stove. The pooping. All three symptoms. Very frightening kid. Has he ever been caught showing anyone his male parts? Touching girls at school inappropriately? He may have seen birthmother doing some stuff...or maybe her boyfriends abused him. That can make a little child really a mess and it's not an easy fix. Love is not enough. Oh, boy, but your husband is wrong if he thinks the boy just needs to live with him in order to get his head straight. It will take years and years of specific therapy and I'm guessing he will not respond to discipline and may even strike you, dad and the little ones. I wouldn't let him near the little ones without supervision.</p><p></p><p>If it were me, and I know it isn't and I k now others who have not lived with such a child may disagree, but there is no way I'd allow him to come to live with you and be near your two babies. God knows what he would do to them. It is your decision, of course, but I'd actually divorce the man before I'd allow the son to live in the same house as my two kids. But that's jumping ahead. He hasn't asked for Son to live there yet. He has two other children to think about. Remind him of that. And all the time? No mom? No break at all? Think logically and decide. Leave your heart out of it when it involves your other two kids. I thought with my heart and I'm so sorry I did.</p><p></p><p>Son will likely end up in a residential treatment center one day and it is probably best for all, including the son, to get that level of help. Is social services involved at all? Why wont' they help grandma find a placement for this child?</p><p></p><p>You have every reason to be afraid. You will be sorry if you bring him to your house. He is very much like our child was and cleaning up the damage after he was gone was not fun or easy to do. We were lucky that the state was so sympathetic to us and that the kid, for whatever reason, admitted all that he had done instead of saying, "I didn't do it. Dad and Mom did it." That would have put us on the hot seat. These types of kids can end you up in jail.</p><p></p><p>Be careful. I'm so sorry.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 623764, member: 1550"] Ok, I read the whole thing. This child has obviously had a very hard time in his early years and I believe in my gut he has attachment disorder. Letting the dogs eat the toad alive then letting it live is very typical. The fires by grandma's stove. The pooping. All three symptoms. Very frightening kid. Has he ever been caught showing anyone his male parts? Touching girls at school inappropriately? He may have seen birthmother doing some stuff...or maybe her boyfriends abused him. That can make a little child really a mess and it's not an easy fix. Love is not enough. Oh, boy, but your husband is wrong if he thinks the boy just needs to live with him in order to get his head straight. It will take years and years of specific therapy and I'm guessing he will not respond to discipline and may even strike you, dad and the little ones. I wouldn't let him near the little ones without supervision. If it were me, and I know it isn't and I k now others who have not lived with such a child may disagree, but there is no way I'd allow him to come to live with you and be near your two babies. God knows what he would do to them. It is your decision, of course, but I'd actually divorce the man before I'd allow the son to live in the same house as my two kids. But that's jumping ahead. He hasn't asked for Son to live there yet. He has two other children to think about. Remind him of that. And all the time? No mom? No break at all? Think logically and decide. Leave your heart out of it when it involves your other two kids. I thought with my heart and I'm so sorry I did. Son will likely end up in a residential treatment center one day and it is probably best for all, including the son, to get that level of help. Is social services involved at all? Why wont' they help grandma find a placement for this child? You have every reason to be afraid. You will be sorry if you bring him to your house. He is very much like our child was and cleaning up the damage after he was gone was not fun or easy to do. We were lucky that the state was so sympathetic to us and that the kid, for whatever reason, admitted all that he had done instead of saying, "I didn't do it. Dad and Mom did it." That would have put us on the hot seat. These types of kids can end you up in jail. Be careful. I'm so sorry. [/QUOTE]
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