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School and activities -- how do you deal with them?
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<blockquote data-quote="Andy" data-source="post: 387076" data-attributes="member: 5096"><p>7:00 - 8:00 does seem late for kids that young. I tend to do the same though - sports are important as long as it is something they want to do. That "attack mode" is so scary - I watched my difficult child go through it many times when he was 11 years old and there seems to be no way of reaching him when he enters that zone - all I could do was protect those he was after and let him know that I did not like what he was doing and would not help him with it. He was too big to carry anywhere so I had to isolate him the best I could and wait until he settled down enough to walk to the vehicle to go home.</p><p> </p><p>Then I do turn around the next day and give him another chance. I always wanted him to succeed - to have the opportunities to do the right thing and be happy so even if he was off a bit some days, I did allow the activities that night in the hopes they would help. Some times it backfired like it did with your difficult child the other day but many times it was the break he needed in his day to focus on something he enjoyed. It is a day by day call on your part and when they are begging to go, it is hard to say no.</p><p> </p><p>I never answered your question about keeping a difficult child home if you believed he would be physically agressive that day. I was never in that position - difficult child never started the day in that stance. However, I do not believe it to be truancy if you called the school and told them that difficult child will be staying home today because he is not feeling well. That would be the truth - If he is starting out in an agressive mood, it is because he is not feeling up to facing the day. Angry/agressive people do not feel well and can not think straight. Are you working with anyone in the school that will understand his moods? Someone that if you do send him to school knowing his mind is on aggression and not school that can take him under his/her wings and help him get through the day? Another idea is to perhaps take him in later giving him more time to grasp the day. Does this happen too often to be going in late so much? If it is just once in a while you can try these things but if it is a growing problem than work with his teacher to let her know somehow that it appears that difficult child will have a bad day. She might have some suggestions that will help?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Andy, post: 387076, member: 5096"] 7:00 - 8:00 does seem late for kids that young. I tend to do the same though - sports are important as long as it is something they want to do. That "attack mode" is so scary - I watched my difficult child go through it many times when he was 11 years old and there seems to be no way of reaching him when he enters that zone - all I could do was protect those he was after and let him know that I did not like what he was doing and would not help him with it. He was too big to carry anywhere so I had to isolate him the best I could and wait until he settled down enough to walk to the vehicle to go home. Then I do turn around the next day and give him another chance. I always wanted him to succeed - to have the opportunities to do the right thing and be happy so even if he was off a bit some days, I did allow the activities that night in the hopes they would help. Some times it backfired like it did with your difficult child the other day but many times it was the break he needed in his day to focus on something he enjoyed. It is a day by day call on your part and when they are begging to go, it is hard to say no. I never answered your question about keeping a difficult child home if you believed he would be physically agressive that day. I was never in that position - difficult child never started the day in that stance. However, I do not believe it to be truancy if you called the school and told them that difficult child will be staying home today because he is not feeling well. That would be the truth - If he is starting out in an agressive mood, it is because he is not feeling up to facing the day. Angry/agressive people do not feel well and can not think straight. Are you working with anyone in the school that will understand his moods? Someone that if you do send him to school knowing his mind is on aggression and not school that can take him under his/her wings and help him get through the day? Another idea is to perhaps take him in later giving him more time to grasp the day. Does this happen too often to be going in late so much? If it is just once in a while you can try these things but if it is a growing problem than work with his teacher to let her know somehow that it appears that difficult child will have a bad day. She might have some suggestions that will help? [/QUOTE]
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