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School is a constant source of negativity
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 394036" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>Does your child get any social skills classes? My son is on the autism spectrum and those classes REALLY helped him. He was impulsive too, but he is very calm now. He may get angry faster than another kid, but he would never hit anyone. I really give credit to all the help he got in school...we, as parents, can not do it alone. And the fact is, our kids have to follow the school rules.</p><p></p><p>Does your son have an IEP? Mine did and that's the thing that forced the school legally to modify things for a child such as him. I strongly recommend asking for an IEP if you don't have one. If you go this route (and do it in writing, keeping a copy for yourself), also find a Parent Advocate so that you know what to ask for and you don't go into any school meeting alone. I have an IEP meeting tomorrow and I'm bringing two advocates. Your child does not have to be failing to get an IEP. His trouble controlling himself is enough. But if you just go to the school, and don't get outside help, they will probably try to deny you an IEP because "he's doing ok in school." He isn't doing ok. He keeps getting into trouble. That is a disability. ADHD is covered as a disability in many states. You could also go for Other Health Impaired with includes any disorder that harms a child's ability to function in school. </p><p></p><p>There ARE some kids in my opinion who would be miserable being homeschooled. I homeschooled for a year and although there was a homeschool gruop, it wasn't the same. I put my kids back in school so they could have more contact with other kids. The homeschooling is your call. I thought about it for my daughter who has ADHD because the school was not helping her and I hate fighting with schools (which is almost what you have to do to get services). However, she is popular and social and wanted to to see her friends every day even if it meant flunking every class. I couldn't take that away from her. So we go for a meeting tomorrow and I think the school district will have to give her the IEP. She was tested and did not do well on the testing. However, certain diagnoses get you IEPs as well. Are you sure your son doesn't have Aspergers? Some Aspergers kids are social, but they really don't know how to relate to other kids so they are more negative.</p><p></p><p>I wish you good luck, whatever you decide to do. It is so hard when it seems the school is picking on our kid. I saw that start with my daughter and put a quick end to it. They were trying to blame her for her own learning disabilities. The advocates got after them and now they are being as nice as you please <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> Just takes the right people in your corner. I think it is usually not helpful to work only within the school district. Sadly, they get ideas about your kid and pass that idea around. in my opinion it's best to found help outside the school district..help that has some control over what your school district does. Call your Dept. of Public Education to find the free advocate in your particular areas. Take care <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p><p></p><p>PS--To Marg: In MOST (not all) states in the US, homeschooled kids are excluded from all public school activities. Completely. I don't recall which state this child is from...I think NY and California let homeschooled kids have some school activities....not sure that any other states do. Most high school kid's activities here are through the school district...so it can be hard...</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 394036, member: 1550"] Does your child get any social skills classes? My son is on the autism spectrum and those classes REALLY helped him. He was impulsive too, but he is very calm now. He may get angry faster than another kid, but he would never hit anyone. I really give credit to all the help he got in school...we, as parents, can not do it alone. And the fact is, our kids have to follow the school rules. Does your son have an IEP? Mine did and that's the thing that forced the school legally to modify things for a child such as him. I strongly recommend asking for an IEP if you don't have one. If you go this route (and do it in writing, keeping a copy for yourself), also find a Parent Advocate so that you know what to ask for and you don't go into any school meeting alone. I have an IEP meeting tomorrow and I'm bringing two advocates. Your child does not have to be failing to get an IEP. His trouble controlling himself is enough. But if you just go to the school, and don't get outside help, they will probably try to deny you an IEP because "he's doing ok in school." He isn't doing ok. He keeps getting into trouble. That is a disability. ADHD is covered as a disability in many states. You could also go for Other Health Impaired with includes any disorder that harms a child's ability to function in school. There ARE some kids in my opinion who would be miserable being homeschooled. I homeschooled for a year and although there was a homeschool gruop, it wasn't the same. I put my kids back in school so they could have more contact with other kids. The homeschooling is your call. I thought about it for my daughter who has ADHD because the school was not helping her and I hate fighting with schools (which is almost what you have to do to get services). However, she is popular and social and wanted to to see her friends every day even if it meant flunking every class. I couldn't take that away from her. So we go for a meeting tomorrow and I think the school district will have to give her the IEP. She was tested and did not do well on the testing. However, certain diagnoses get you IEPs as well. Are you sure your son doesn't have Aspergers? Some Aspergers kids are social, but they really don't know how to relate to other kids so they are more negative. I wish you good luck, whatever you decide to do. It is so hard when it seems the school is picking on our kid. I saw that start with my daughter and put a quick end to it. They were trying to blame her for her own learning disabilities. The advocates got after them and now they are being as nice as you please :) Just takes the right people in your corner. I think it is usually not helpful to work only within the school district. Sadly, they get ideas about your kid and pass that idea around. in my opinion it's best to found help outside the school district..help that has some control over what your school district does. Call your Dept. of Public Education to find the free advocate in your particular areas. Take care :) PS--To Marg: In MOST (not all) states in the US, homeschooled kids are excluded from all public school activities. Completely. I don't recall which state this child is from...I think NY and California let homeschooled kids have some school activities....not sure that any other states do. Most high school kid's activities here are through the school district...so it can be hard... [/QUOTE]
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