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Parent Support Forums
Substance Abuse
second-guessing our decision to bring our son home from Residential Treatment Center (RTC)
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 245817" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>All I can say is, I never put my daughter in an Residential Treatment Center (RTC). I didn't even realize it was an option back then (I hadn't found this board and nobody told me). It would have broken my heart, but I would have done it had I know, in retrospect. Even with homeschooling my daughter, I COULD NOT KEEP HER IN THE HOUSE AND AWAY FROM DRUGS & HER TOXIC FRIENDS. She found ways to get out, usually when we were sleeping. We tried hard, but we couldn't keep an eye on her 24/7. If I ran to the store and thought she was still asleep, she'd be gone when we came back. I have no opinion on what you should or shouldn't do. I just know that my daughter, like most drug users, was incredibly wily and clever and manipulative (she could pout and turn on the waterworks because she knew I was basically softhearted). I know I personally (along with my hub) couldn't keep her from self-destruction. Also, realize that when a child says "I'm smoking pot" (like mine did) likely he is doing MUCH more than smoking pot, no matter what he says or what you want to think. Pot doesn't cause one to put holes in the wall, steal money or get overly aggressive, if that's what was going on. My daughter, who is now clean, tells me the tricks of the trade and that "everyone always tells their moms they just use pot and usually the parents believe it." Don't. And never take your eyes off of him. He'll give you a honeymoon period to soften you up. He'll make you think he's learned his lesson to get his privileges back. Heck, if I were you I wouldn't give him phone or internet privledges unless you could check what he was texting or typing. He could be making sneaky plan. My pessimistic guess from experience is that after a period of perfect behavior in which you think he's ch anged, he'll finally strike, maybe harder, so you can't give him an inch, even when he seems to be on "yes ma'am" behavior. I think your ex is dreaming. Good luck!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 245817, member: 1550"] All I can say is, I never put my daughter in an Residential Treatment Center (RTC). I didn't even realize it was an option back then (I hadn't found this board and nobody told me). It would have broken my heart, but I would have done it had I know, in retrospect. Even with homeschooling my daughter, I COULD NOT KEEP HER IN THE HOUSE AND AWAY FROM DRUGS & HER TOXIC FRIENDS. She found ways to get out, usually when we were sleeping. We tried hard, but we couldn't keep an eye on her 24/7. If I ran to the store and thought she was still asleep, she'd be gone when we came back. I have no opinion on what you should or shouldn't do. I just know that my daughter, like most drug users, was incredibly wily and clever and manipulative (she could pout and turn on the waterworks because she knew I was basically softhearted). I know I personally (along with my hub) couldn't keep her from self-destruction. Also, realize that when a child says "I'm smoking pot" (like mine did) likely he is doing MUCH more than smoking pot, no matter what he says or what you want to think. Pot doesn't cause one to put holes in the wall, steal money or get overly aggressive, if that's what was going on. My daughter, who is now clean, tells me the tricks of the trade and that "everyone always tells their moms they just use pot and usually the parents believe it." Don't. And never take your eyes off of him. He'll give you a honeymoon period to soften you up. He'll make you think he's learned his lesson to get his privileges back. Heck, if I were you I wouldn't give him phone or internet privledges unless you could check what he was texting or typing. He could be making sneaky plan. My pessimistic guess from experience is that after a period of perfect behavior in which you think he's ch anged, he'll finally strike, maybe harder, so you can't give him an inch, even when he seems to be on "yes ma'am" behavior. I think your ex is dreaming. Good luck! [/QUOTE]
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second-guessing our decision to bring our son home from Residential Treatment Center (RTC)
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