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Substance Abuse
second-guessing our decision to bring our son home from Residential Treatment Center (RTC)
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 246099" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>WE WERE a unified front and still couldn't stop daughter. Unless you are willing to do 24/7 sleep shifts, your son can easily get out while you're asleep (unless you get an alarm and he doesn't dismantle it). Our daughter climbed out her window and plain old walked out the door while we were sleeping. Before we homeschooled her, she did drugs inside the school and right outside of it too. She was a good faker and the school never suspected or called me. You literally have to watch them ALL THE TIME or they will find a way. Rules are for other people, not drug users. They don't care if you put up a united front or what you threaten to do to them. They need to get high and they will get high. That's why I say that I'd have put my daughter in an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) if I had known about them. At least she'd have been off the streets, unable to escape "out there", been away from her friends who only made things worse, and getting some sort of help. She finally quit after we had to throw her out. She ran to her brother's house. He lives in another state and is a straight arrow to the max. Knowing it was her last possible place to live other than the streets, she straightened up her act fast. On top of that, she had really WANTED to quit quite a few times, however her friends (ahem, I use the word loosely) would badger her and nag her and she'd always give in to them. Once she was out of their orbit she was able to quit without being pressured to go back to it. Druggies love company. They don't take kindly to one of their own kind changing. My daughter has often checked on her old "friends" to see how they're doing (she is now 24 and in college). Only one of her old gang besides her is on the straight road now. Everyone else is unemployed, in jail, just out of jail, etc. A few are even attempting to raise kids while they take drugs around them. Some have lost custody of their kids to social services.</p><p> It is very important to stop your child before it becomes a way of life. Once the kids are in their mid-20's and still doing drugs, well, I see the prognosis as much worse. My daughter took drugs from age 12 to age 19. Then she met her geeky boyfriend and he helped keep her honest too. Personally, I would not take on as heavy a burden as trying to keep my child off of drugs. There are too many ways they can trick you. As my daughter says, "Never trust a drug addict." They will do or say anything to win your trust and do their thing all over again, often with parents glowing that their kids are "doing so well" until the truth hits them again. I've been there too. Often the kids really need a totally new change of atmosphere and 24/7 controls. Lastly, my daughter hated therapists, didn't respect their opinions, didn't listen to them, barely talked to them, and they didn't help her one bit. I don't think therapy is enough. JMO.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 246099, member: 1550"] WE WERE a unified front and still couldn't stop daughter. Unless you are willing to do 24/7 sleep shifts, your son can easily get out while you're asleep (unless you get an alarm and he doesn't dismantle it). Our daughter climbed out her window and plain old walked out the door while we were sleeping. Before we homeschooled her, she did drugs inside the school and right outside of it too. She was a good faker and the school never suspected or called me. You literally have to watch them ALL THE TIME or they will find a way. Rules are for other people, not drug users. They don't care if you put up a united front or what you threaten to do to them. They need to get high and they will get high. That's why I say that I'd have put my daughter in an Residential Treatment Center (RTC) if I had known about them. At least she'd have been off the streets, unable to escape "out there", been away from her friends who only made things worse, and getting some sort of help. She finally quit after we had to throw her out. She ran to her brother's house. He lives in another state and is a straight arrow to the max. Knowing it was her last possible place to live other than the streets, she straightened up her act fast. On top of that, she had really WANTED to quit quite a few times, however her friends (ahem, I use the word loosely) would badger her and nag her and she'd always give in to them. Once she was out of their orbit she was able to quit without being pressured to go back to it. Druggies love company. They don't take kindly to one of their own kind changing. My daughter has often checked on her old "friends" to see how they're doing (she is now 24 and in college). Only one of her old gang besides her is on the straight road now. Everyone else is unemployed, in jail, just out of jail, etc. A few are even attempting to raise kids while they take drugs around them. Some have lost custody of their kids to social services. It is very important to stop your child before it becomes a way of life. Once the kids are in their mid-20's and still doing drugs, well, I see the prognosis as much worse. My daughter took drugs from age 12 to age 19. Then she met her geeky boyfriend and he helped keep her honest too. Personally, I would not take on as heavy a burden as trying to keep my child off of drugs. There are too many ways they can trick you. As my daughter says, "Never trust a drug addict." They will do or say anything to win your trust and do their thing all over again, often with parents glowing that their kids are "doing so well" until the truth hits them again. I've been there too. Often the kids really need a totally new change of atmosphere and 24/7 controls. Lastly, my daughter hated therapists, didn't respect their opinions, didn't listen to them, barely talked to them, and they didn't help her one bit. I don't think therapy is enough. JMO. [/QUOTE]
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second-guessing our decision to bring our son home from Residential Treatment Center (RTC)
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