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seeking support (WNC GAL???) as my daughter had suicidal issues, in PRTF now
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<blockquote data-quote="carolinwaxhaw" data-source="post: 539499" data-attributes="member: 14846"><p>Hi Liahona: Well her stay at the PRTF was approx 6 months - release approx Sept 20, 2012. I had a conf call with the managed care people for NC Medicaid and they are talking "step down" to Level III Group Home; Level II Therapeutic Foster Home, etc, etc What I would like is to (A) find a job that I can do in my "free" time from home; (B) have her return home when she is "ready" (C)am thinking of homeschooling her for the first year (8th grade) and saying you have had a rough year and need to transition back home, etc. and that Level 3 and Level 4 are out there and offer her the OPTION to get her feedback (tell her she is NOT making the decision!!!) to homeschool and live at home. She has wanted to return to her school BUT verbalized she was nervous about that. I am BEYOND nervous since she's had two suicide attempts and expressions (total) at the school last year. I am also contemplating having her in private Christian school instead of our public school. (And OH YES - I am STILL her mom and I am the mom who calls the PRTF ALL the time). It is heartbreaking about my daughter because in so many ways she just does not seem like she should be there...sort of a "little girl lost" kind of thing but she can manipulate me, that is for sure, Yes she is on medications (40 mg Celexa in am; 100 mg Lamictal in pm; and 50 mg Seroquel in pm for sleep and also Seroquel is a prn for anxiety). I don't think anyone thinks she won't attempt to hurt herself but she progressed to Level III (there are 7 levels at the PRTF) and they are working with her. She is very very reluctant to express her feelings and I have written two really beautiful letters for her (therapist only gave her one thus far as the second had my "grief" re: her friendships and potential to harm herself). Oh yes, I am crying frequently - today was the last day of our four day visit with her and i just (in the am) was crying all morning before going to the PRTF and crying just thinking about having to leave her there; then I started crying (to myself) mid-afternoon just looking at them and wondering if this was going to be the last time... i don't know what i have - depression? severe depression??? i am such a mess - i am grateful I lost my job as I can focus more on this and what I can do for her. Anyway - my letters are about therapy and explaining how therapists are compassionate, how they are caring, they have the same goal she has, their JOB is to help her reach her goal and have a better life; etc etc etc and empathizing how hard it is for my difficult child 1 to express feelings - - it was really a great letter; much more to it than this. My difficult child 2 and I went up Friday am for family therapy, stayed in a friend's house (no ac, no tv, no internet!!!!) and semi-house sat their donkey, goat, min. horse, and house cat!!!! but we did not have to pay for a hotel - - which I can't do. have a neighbor who has used his points and given us a hotel room and offered to do it again so am planning for that too in a few weeks.</p><p></p><p>As to her - when we went back to PRTF after pass today they checked her (as they ALWAYS do) and I am so sad and depressed that she had a wooden golf tee somewhere in her clothes. I was not watching her unroll pants, shoes, socks and was focusing on other stuff as they did this with her and checked her in. I am praying she "forgot" but there is no good reason for her to have a wooden golf tee in her pants!!! (we did golf at the PRTF but she should NOT, of course, put something sharp in her pockets, etc and she KNOWS this......)</p><p></p><p>Thx!</p><p></p><p>Carol</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="carolinwaxhaw, post: 539499, member: 14846"] Hi Liahona: Well her stay at the PRTF was approx 6 months - release approx Sept 20, 2012. I had a conf call with the managed care people for NC Medicaid and they are talking "step down" to Level III Group Home; Level II Therapeutic Foster Home, etc, etc What I would like is to (A) find a job that I can do in my "free" time from home; (B) have her return home when she is "ready" (C)am thinking of homeschooling her for the first year (8th grade) and saying you have had a rough year and need to transition back home, etc. and that Level 3 and Level 4 are out there and offer her the OPTION to get her feedback (tell her she is NOT making the decision!!!) to homeschool and live at home. She has wanted to return to her school BUT verbalized she was nervous about that. I am BEYOND nervous since she's had two suicide attempts and expressions (total) at the school last year. I am also contemplating having her in private Christian school instead of our public school. (And OH YES - I am STILL her mom and I am the mom who calls the PRTF ALL the time). It is heartbreaking about my daughter because in so many ways she just does not seem like she should be there...sort of a "little girl lost" kind of thing but she can manipulate me, that is for sure, Yes she is on medications (40 mg Celexa in am; 100 mg Lamictal in pm; and 50 mg Seroquel in pm for sleep and also Seroquel is a prn for anxiety). I don't think anyone thinks she won't attempt to hurt herself but she progressed to Level III (there are 7 levels at the PRTF) and they are working with her. She is very very reluctant to express her feelings and I have written two really beautiful letters for her (therapist only gave her one thus far as the second had my "grief" re: her friendships and potential to harm herself). Oh yes, I am crying frequently - today was the last day of our four day visit with her and i just (in the am) was crying all morning before going to the PRTF and crying just thinking about having to leave her there; then I started crying (to myself) mid-afternoon just looking at them and wondering if this was going to be the last time... i don't know what i have - depression? severe depression??? i am such a mess - i am grateful I lost my job as I can focus more on this and what I can do for her. Anyway - my letters are about therapy and explaining how therapists are compassionate, how they are caring, they have the same goal she has, their JOB is to help her reach her goal and have a better life; etc etc etc and empathizing how hard it is for my difficult child 1 to express feelings - - it was really a great letter; much more to it than this. My difficult child 2 and I went up Friday am for family therapy, stayed in a friend's house (no ac, no tv, no internet!!!!) and semi-house sat their donkey, goat, min. horse, and house cat!!!! but we did not have to pay for a hotel - - which I can't do. have a neighbor who has used his points and given us a hotel room and offered to do it again so am planning for that too in a few weeks. As to her - when we went back to PRTF after pass today they checked her (as they ALWAYS do) and I am so sad and depressed that she had a wooden golf tee somewhere in her clothes. I was not watching her unroll pants, shoes, socks and was focusing on other stuff as they did this with her and checked her in. I am praying she "forgot" but there is no good reason for her to have a wooden golf tee in her pants!!! (we did golf at the PRTF but she should NOT, of course, put something sharp in her pockets, etc and she KNOWS this......) Thx! Carol [/QUOTE]
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seeking support (WNC GAL???) as my daughter had suicidal issues, in PRTF now
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