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Self preservation or just plain Selfish!?!
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<blockquote data-quote="lovemysons" data-source="post: 605379" data-attributes="member: 3305"><p>Needless to say it has been a restless night's sleep as posting these things about my mom leaves me a bit uncomfortable...Not honoring her. </p><p></p><p>Muttmeister...I want to say how sorry I am about the loss of your mom recently. You are right that I have a choice to feel badly about what she didn't do or be thankful for what she did. And she did take me away from an abusive, alcoholic dad. She has also been there for me if I was ever in need of Dr's care and even my Pyschotic breakdown 6 1/2yrs ago. And I have always known that she loves me...and did the best she could with what she had. She also worked very hard while raising me and put herself through college. She was only 17 when she had me and she had lived in the same small little town til that point. I think she couldn't wait to break free and see the world! I was not so adaptive to change and as I said before I had no roots or anyone to share life experiences with...I stayed very lonely. But you're right, it was likely no bed of roses for my mother either...especially as I was undxd Bipolar and she had to deal with my behavior's from very young age. I know I was a source of hardship for her. </p><p> </p><p>Suzir...Thank you for sharing your story with me and thoughts about inheritance where you come from as well. My Aunt and Uncle are very well off due to land that my Uncle's grandmother left to them. They have been able to help all there children and grandchildren and will be able to help generations to come. And if you knew my Aunt and Uncle you would know they are just as good as they get too! My Aunt is very dear to me. </p><p></p><p>Janet...I am always so sorry to hear of the wounds your mother left on you. My story is not nearly as painful as that. Caring ((((hugs)))). </p><p></p><p></p><p>Susie...I have thought about what I will do when she is older and less able bodied. In fact my mom and I have talked in the past and she wants to be placed in a facility with other people, games, entertainment, etc. And that is one of the reasons that I don't think there will be anything "left" as it will likely be used to care for her in the way she wants to be cared for at the end of her life. But if her money does run out...I WILL care for her. </p><p>I know I probably should talk to a therapist about situations re my mom. I don't often get this upset but lately it's just been one reminder after another of her "Me Me Me" attitude. </p><p>As you may know, Oldest difficult child, is expecting his 3rd baby girl Sept 6th...the day my leaves for Spain, sigh. </p><p></p><p>DDD...I am not feeling very "amazing" this morning but I always thank you for your kindness and caring. I had a grandmother until the end of my 13th yr. In many ways you remind me of the grandmother that I no longer have as she always tried to let me know in various ways how special I was to her. My grandfather (on my mom's side) died when I was 3 yrs old...but I do remember him playing with me. My grandparents were good, hardworking people. </p><p></p><p>Thank you for sharing your thoughts and even if my mom is a bit on the selfish side...I do love my mom and I know she loves me. </p><p></p><p>LMS</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="lovemysons, post: 605379, member: 3305"] Needless to say it has been a restless night's sleep as posting these things about my mom leaves me a bit uncomfortable...Not honoring her. Muttmeister...I want to say how sorry I am about the loss of your mom recently. You are right that I have a choice to feel badly about what she didn't do or be thankful for what she did. And she did take me away from an abusive, alcoholic dad. She has also been there for me if I was ever in need of Dr's care and even my Pyschotic breakdown 6 1/2yrs ago. And I have always known that she loves me...and did the best she could with what she had. She also worked very hard while raising me and put herself through college. She was only 17 when she had me and she had lived in the same small little town til that point. I think she couldn't wait to break free and see the world! I was not so adaptive to change and as I said before I had no roots or anyone to share life experiences with...I stayed very lonely. But you're right, it was likely no bed of roses for my mother either...especially as I was undxd Bipolar and she had to deal with my behavior's from very young age. I know I was a source of hardship for her. Suzir...Thank you for sharing your story with me and thoughts about inheritance where you come from as well. My Aunt and Uncle are very well off due to land that my Uncle's grandmother left to them. They have been able to help all there children and grandchildren and will be able to help generations to come. And if you knew my Aunt and Uncle you would know they are just as good as they get too! My Aunt is very dear to me. Janet...I am always so sorry to hear of the wounds your mother left on you. My story is not nearly as painful as that. Caring ((((hugs)))). Susie...I have thought about what I will do when she is older and less able bodied. In fact my mom and I have talked in the past and she wants to be placed in a facility with other people, games, entertainment, etc. And that is one of the reasons that I don't think there will be anything "left" as it will likely be used to care for her in the way she wants to be cared for at the end of her life. But if her money does run out...I WILL care for her. I know I probably should talk to a therapist about situations re my mom. I don't often get this upset but lately it's just been one reminder after another of her "Me Me Me" attitude. As you may know, Oldest difficult child, is expecting his 3rd baby girl Sept 6th...the day my leaves for Spain, sigh. DDD...I am not feeling very "amazing" this morning but I always thank you for your kindness and caring. I had a grandmother until the end of my 13th yr. In many ways you remind me of the grandmother that I no longer have as she always tried to let me know in various ways how special I was to her. My grandfather (on my mom's side) died when I was 3 yrs old...but I do remember him playing with me. My grandparents were good, hardworking people. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and even if my mom is a bit on the selfish side...I do love my mom and I know she loves me. LMS [/QUOTE]
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