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<blockquote data-quote="jbrain" data-source="post: 47485" data-attributes="member: 3450"><p>Karen,</p><p>I feel the same way you do--my only regret is not protecting difficult child 2 from difficult child 1 and basically ignoring easy child son. I didn't know the extent of the abuse but I did know that difficult child 1 could be horribly mean to difficult child 2 and also knew of the stealing.</p><p></p><p>My easy child son is older than difficult child 2 so he was better able to protect himself and to understand, yet he too got left to fend for himself. I remember him telling me one day that ever since his dad died (he was 12) he has felt alone. He felt that he couldn't come to me with any problems because Emily was so much work. He basically stayed in his room and kept to himself when he was a teen and I let him because it was easier to not deal with him.</p><p></p><p>So, if I could do things over I would really try not to let difficult child 1 overtake the whole family with her gfgness and not devote myself so much to her and her problems. I think I could have done much less to help her and she would not have suffered! I really had blinders on, thought I could fix her, I guess. Molly saw through her so much earlier than I did, caused a lot of resentment.</p><p></p><p>I think the best thing I did to help difficult child 1 was to kick her out and make her learn to fend for herself. It was also the best thing for the rest of the family. We like living with less drama and chaos in our lives!</p><p></p><p>Jane</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="jbrain, post: 47485, member: 3450"] Karen, I feel the same way you do--my only regret is not protecting difficult child 2 from difficult child 1 and basically ignoring easy child son. I didn't know the extent of the abuse but I did know that difficult child 1 could be horribly mean to difficult child 2 and also knew of the stealing. My easy child son is older than difficult child 2 so he was better able to protect himself and to understand, yet he too got left to fend for himself. I remember him telling me one day that ever since his dad died (he was 12) he has felt alone. He felt that he couldn't come to me with any problems because Emily was so much work. He basically stayed in his room and kept to himself when he was a teen and I let him because it was easier to not deal with him. So, if I could do things over I would really try not to let difficult child 1 overtake the whole family with her gfgness and not devote myself so much to her and her problems. I think I could have done much less to help her and she would not have suffered! I really had blinders on, thought I could fix her, I guess. Molly saw through her so much earlier than I did, caused a lot of resentment. I think the best thing I did to help difficult child 1 was to kick her out and make her learn to fend for herself. It was also the best thing for the rest of the family. We like living with less drama and chaos in our lives! Jane [/QUOTE]
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