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General Parenting
She finally got CAUGHT - YEE-HAW!!!!!
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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 227088" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>I'm surprised it took as long as it did, but we all knew tis day wouldcome.</p><p></p><p>I'm glad she's not in Riker's, although the "career criminal" concerns I think are a bit late. She's already too far down that path to really worry that they will teach her more. </p><p></p><p>It has to be HER choice to get help, although the court system will hopefully be offering it or maybe even enforcing it. But if she continues to have an attitude of "it's being forced on me, I'll resist" then any help is going to get undermined, until she really does "get it" and make her own decision to use advantages to her own benefit instead of self-sabotaging.</p><p></p><p>Bran, I know you understand intellectually, that when she refers to you as a female dog, it's not something you should take on board. But it still cuts, it still hurts. Can you keep reminding yourself when she says such mean things, that it is HEER lifestyle, HER choices, that are leading to this? When she calls you such mean things, those words apply much more accurately to herself than to you. And she knows it. That's why she's attacking you - to deflect her own guilt from her own mind, onto you. She's trying to convince herself that you are the cause of her troubles. If she can make you feel that guilt, then she feels justified. So the more you fight that, the more you refuse to accept any of the guilt, then the sooner she has to face the consequences of her own actions.</p><p></p><p>Not easy. But by not owning it, you're not only helping yourself -you're helping her.</p><p></p><p>For now, keep your focus on your son. He needs you, he needs a parent who is holding things together and keeping him safe.</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 227088, member: 1991"] I'm surprised it took as long as it did, but we all knew tis day wouldcome. I'm glad she's not in Riker's, although the "career criminal" concerns I think are a bit late. She's already too far down that path to really worry that they will teach her more. It has to be HER choice to get help, although the court system will hopefully be offering it or maybe even enforcing it. But if she continues to have an attitude of "it's being forced on me, I'll resist" then any help is going to get undermined, until she really does "get it" and make her own decision to use advantages to her own benefit instead of self-sabotaging. Bran, I know you understand intellectually, that when she refers to you as a female dog, it's not something you should take on board. But it still cuts, it still hurts. Can you keep reminding yourself when she says such mean things, that it is HEER lifestyle, HER choices, that are leading to this? When she calls you such mean things, those words apply much more accurately to herself than to you. And she knows it. That's why she's attacking you - to deflect her own guilt from her own mind, onto you. She's trying to convince herself that you are the cause of her troubles. If she can make you feel that guilt, then she feels justified. So the more you fight that, the more you refuse to accept any of the guilt, then the sooner she has to face the consequences of her own actions. Not easy. But by not owning it, you're not only helping yourself -you're helping her. For now, keep your focus on your son. He needs you, he needs a parent who is holding things together and keeping him safe. Marg [/QUOTE]
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She finally got CAUGHT - YEE-HAW!!!!!
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