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She wants to come home and follow the rules
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<blockquote data-quote="accmama" data-source="post: 609664"><p>mwm- you bring up a great point. yes, she will follow their rules. She has been in a group home and also a rehab and in detention and at each place she was a model client. She made wonderful strides in rehab but within a week of being home she went out got drunk. That first night of drinking and chaos was enough to get her to see that she had to go far far away from friends who tempt her. She came home that night, sat on the couch and sobbed, saying she was not safe here locally because all of her friends drink and/or use drugs. She asked me to fly her up to my mom's house so she could stay away from all of the friends she partied with. We put her on a plane the next day. She lasted almost a year there before she started dating a guy and then before we knew it she was back at square one.</p><p></p><p>So basically yes, she does very well with highly structured programs. She needs someone other than me to tell her what to do, how to do it and when to do it. She listens to counselors and will follow rules. I just think she's so immature that she needs the kind of structure a 10 year old would have at home but since she's 19 it is hard to give her those kinds of limits. So, she ends up messing up because she's so impulsive. </p><p></p><p>I truly believe....maybe I'm still thinking wishfully....that with the right amount of help and some maturity, she can be okay. I know that I am not able to provide the kind of structured environment and counseling that she needs. I just do not have it in me. </p><p></p><p>But yes, you are all right. She needs to want this and do this. I've been encouraging her via text but also stay very firm that she will not have my support, emotionally or financially unless she is taking my advice and moving forward in a positive direction. </p><p></p><p>The woman at the 2 year program called her back today. She is supposed to meet her tomorrow. PRAY that this works out. I know it will be good for her. I know she can do this.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="accmama, post: 609664"] mwm- you bring up a great point. yes, she will follow their rules. She has been in a group home and also a rehab and in detention and at each place she was a model client. She made wonderful strides in rehab but within a week of being home she went out got drunk. That first night of drinking and chaos was enough to get her to see that she had to go far far away from friends who tempt her. She came home that night, sat on the couch and sobbed, saying she was not safe here locally because all of her friends drink and/or use drugs. She asked me to fly her up to my mom's house so she could stay away from all of the friends she partied with. We put her on a plane the next day. She lasted almost a year there before she started dating a guy and then before we knew it she was back at square one. So basically yes, she does very well with highly structured programs. She needs someone other than me to tell her what to do, how to do it and when to do it. She listens to counselors and will follow rules. I just think she's so immature that she needs the kind of structure a 10 year old would have at home but since she's 19 it is hard to give her those kinds of limits. So, she ends up messing up because she's so impulsive. I truly believe....maybe I'm still thinking wishfully....that with the right amount of help and some maturity, she can be okay. I know that I am not able to provide the kind of structured environment and counseling that she needs. I just do not have it in me. But yes, you are all right. She needs to want this and do this. I've been encouraging her via text but also stay very firm that she will not have my support, emotionally or financially unless she is taking my advice and moving forward in a positive direction. The woman at the 2 year program called her back today. She is supposed to meet her tomorrow. PRAY that this works out. I know it will be good for her. I know she can do this. [/QUOTE]
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