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Parent Emeritus
So...now what?!
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 611406" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>You are sure then that he did not suffer from learning disabilities, autistic spectrum disorder, or cognitive issues? He does not sound like the type of rebellious young adult who would be doing this on purpose. And it appears he has not been duly tested. In your shoes, that is what I'd do before I made any demands of him that he may never be able to fulfill. It is hard to think that maybe our children are not capable, but it is cruel to "punish" them if they truly can not hold a job. I don't very often tell parents to be patient with 18 and ups, but this young man sounds like a decent fellow who has trouble learning, and not on purpose as he does not have a rebellious nature. </p><p></p><p>Hope you don't rule out this good possibility. If you don't see if he is capable or not, I wish him the best and hope he gets help somewhere...I am not convinced this is somebody who should be thrown out for not working. I was called "lazy" too and it turns out I have many neurological and cognitive deficits and, had somebody not been willing to marry me, even though it was a horrendous marriage, I probably would have ended up homeless simply because I kept get fired from jobs, over and over again, even though I tried extremely hard. I am concerned about this young man. The gap between my parents, who thought I was just a lazy bum, and myself never mended. My mom is dead now and she STILL never got it. She always told everyone how lazy I was.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 611406, member: 1550"] You are sure then that he did not suffer from learning disabilities, autistic spectrum disorder, or cognitive issues? He does not sound like the type of rebellious young adult who would be doing this on purpose. And it appears he has not been duly tested. In your shoes, that is what I'd do before I made any demands of him that he may never be able to fulfill. It is hard to think that maybe our children are not capable, but it is cruel to "punish" them if they truly can not hold a job. I don't very often tell parents to be patient with 18 and ups, but this young man sounds like a decent fellow who has trouble learning, and not on purpose as he does not have a rebellious nature. Hope you don't rule out this good possibility. If you don't see if he is capable or not, I wish him the best and hope he gets help somewhere...I am not convinced this is somebody who should be thrown out for not working. I was called "lazy" too and it turns out I have many neurological and cognitive deficits and, had somebody not been willing to marry me, even though it was a horrendous marriage, I probably would have ended up homeless simply because I kept get fired from jobs, over and over again, even though I tried extremely hard. I am concerned about this young man. The gap between my parents, who thought I was just a lazy bum, and myself never mended. My mom is dead now and she STILL never got it. She always told everyone how lazy I was. [/QUOTE]
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