Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Some days I
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="SearchingForRainbows" data-source="post: 273334" data-attributes="member: 3388"><p>Sharon,</p><p></p><p>I think you've been given great advice. I think Marg is on target. My difficult children also try to get out of their responsibilities by changing the subject, showing me their "best" difficult child behaviors, etc... I've been called a "trucking ugly witch" more times than I can count... </p><p></p><p>The insults fly fast when I try to make my difficult children accept responsibility for either something they were supposed to do and didn't do, or for something they shouldn't have done to begin with. I'm always quick to point out to them that verbal abuse will not be tolerated under any circumstances. Like gcvmom, there are negative consequences for verbal abuse - difficult child 1 loses gaming time, difficult child 2 loses monkey puppet. I wish I could give them extra chores to do like gcvmom does, but trying to get them to follow through and do them appropriately is HE77!!! Even though you said consequences don't help, I would still give them consequences. No one is going to tolerate verbal abuse from them in the "real" world.</p><p></p><p>I like Fran's advice about asking your kids how they would feel if they were in your position. It doesn't work at all with difficult child 1. difficult child 2 will have a "lightbulb" moment about a day after the incident. However, in difficult child 2's case, I'm not sure if he totally feels that his verbal abuse was wrong, or if he is just saying what he knows is the right thing to say. Lots of times I just think he feels badly that he lost time with his monkey puppet. Reflecting back works with my easy child. At any rate, I think Fran is right - All kids need to be made aware of how hurtful their verbal abuse is even if you feel like you're talking to a "brick wall."</p><p></p><p>If you can't get them to stop their verbal abuse, then I think Fran's idea of asking their therapists for help is good. I can't think of anything else you can do. </p><p></p><p>And, as far as not being able to be strong all of the time, I think it's humanly impossible!!! A long time ago, I think it was either in one of Star's or Fran's posts, this sort of thing was compared to a drop of water hitting you on the head constantly. At first it doesn't bother you, but after a while, you just can't take it any more. </p><p></p><p>I hope today is a better day for you. Thinking of you... Hugs... WFEN</p><p></p><p></p><p>I</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="SearchingForRainbows, post: 273334, member: 3388"] Sharon, I think you've been given great advice. I think Marg is on target. My difficult children also try to get out of their responsibilities by changing the subject, showing me their "best" difficult child behaviors, etc... I've been called a "trucking ugly witch" more times than I can count... The insults fly fast when I try to make my difficult children accept responsibility for either something they were supposed to do and didn't do, or for something they shouldn't have done to begin with. I'm always quick to point out to them that verbal abuse will not be tolerated under any circumstances. Like gcvmom, there are negative consequences for verbal abuse - difficult child 1 loses gaming time, difficult child 2 loses monkey puppet. I wish I could give them extra chores to do like gcvmom does, but trying to get them to follow through and do them appropriately is HE77!!! Even though you said consequences don't help, I would still give them consequences. No one is going to tolerate verbal abuse from them in the "real" world. I like Fran's advice about asking your kids how they would feel if they were in your position. It doesn't work at all with difficult child 1. difficult child 2 will have a "lightbulb" moment about a day after the incident. However, in difficult child 2's case, I'm not sure if he totally feels that his verbal abuse was wrong, or if he is just saying what he knows is the right thing to say. Lots of times I just think he feels badly that he lost time with his monkey puppet. Reflecting back works with my easy child. At any rate, I think Fran is right - All kids need to be made aware of how hurtful their verbal abuse is even if you feel like you're talking to a "brick wall." If you can't get them to stop their verbal abuse, then I think Fran's idea of asking their therapists for help is good. I can't think of anything else you can do. And, as far as not being able to be strong all of the time, I think it's humanly impossible!!! A long time ago, I think it was either in one of Star's or Fran's posts, this sort of thing was compared to a drop of water hitting you on the head constantly. At first it doesn't bother you, but after a while, you just can't take it any more. I hope today is a better day for you. Thinking of you... Hugs... WFEN I [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
General Parenting
Some days I
Top