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Son, 19, arrested 2 nights ago--I'm just learning of pot issues
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<blockquote data-quote="feelinghelplesss" data-source="post: 440233" data-attributes="member: 12246"><p>Thanks for the many replies and support. I realize that to many on this forum that mine isn't a huge problem, and most likely my son is in the exploration stage and will grow out of it. But the big red flag was my son, very likely facing a DUI (for weed--2 month wait for drug test), not being able to say "that's it--I'm done with pot!" I feel like we're at a tipping point and that's why I'm here. I want to do the right things now so I don't regret anything later. Being a complete novice in this particular parenting arena, I'm here to seek wisdom from those with far more experience than I. And I can't express how much it is appreciated.</p><p></p><p>I did seek counseling yesterday just to get a feel for what I'm dealing with. I decided as a consequence to the second arrest, my son has to meet with the counselor one time. He of course rolled his eyes and said no, but I said you live in my house and you were driving my car when you were arrested, so you have to suffer my consequence (not to mention the legal ones). I told him he has to meet with the counselor <strong>ONE</strong> time and after that if there are no problems/issues relation to pot, then he never has to go again. So he agreed.</p><p></p><p>The best advice I think I've gotten (here and from the counselor) is DO NOT ENABLE. Make him suffer the consequences. I told him he's on his own if he is charged with the DUI. He can either plea guilty or get a court appointed attorney, but I won't be spending any time or money on this. I know I can't stop him from smoking pot, but I can expect him to live by my rules when he's living at home.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="feelinghelplesss, post: 440233, member: 12246"] Thanks for the many replies and support. I realize that to many on this forum that mine isn't a huge problem, and most likely my son is in the exploration stage and will grow out of it. But the big red flag was my son, very likely facing a DUI (for weed--2 month wait for drug test), not being able to say "that's it--I'm done with pot!" I feel like we're at a tipping point and that's why I'm here. I want to do the right things now so I don't regret anything later. Being a complete novice in this particular parenting arena, I'm here to seek wisdom from those with far more experience than I. And I can't express how much it is appreciated. I did seek counseling yesterday just to get a feel for what I'm dealing with. I decided as a consequence to the second arrest, my son has to meet with the counselor one time. He of course rolled his eyes and said no, but I said you live in my house and you were driving my car when you were arrested, so you have to suffer my consequence (not to mention the legal ones). I told him he has to meet with the counselor [B]ONE[/B] time and after that if there are no problems/issues relation to pot, then he never has to go again. So he agreed. The best advice I think I've gotten (here and from the counselor) is DO NOT ENABLE. Make him suffer the consequences. I told him he's on his own if he is charged with the DUI. He can either plea guilty or get a court appointed attorney, but I won't be spending any time or money on this. I know I can't stop him from smoking pot, but I can expect him to live by my rules when he's living at home. [/QUOTE]
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Son, 19, arrested 2 nights ago--I'm just learning of pot issues
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