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Son hiding his face for the entire counseling session (Autism spectrum)
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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember" data-source="post: 357668" data-attributes="member: 1550"><p>My son is now almost seventeen and, boy, he is going to have to have interventions as an adult. He simply is not going to be ready to face everything at 18. He does GREAT with people he is comfortable with, gets wonderful grades, and even has school friends (although he rarely sees them out of school). I want to explain how a counseling session went. She is my counselor and I wanted her to see him to find out if she feels I should start looking into services for him or if she feels he will be labeled as too high functioning. Plus we had an issue with him that we wanted to discuss.</p><p></p><p>The meeting went like this. First he wouldn't get out of the car, but I left him there, knowing he'd eventually come inside, and he did (before the meeting). Then we (hub, me, son) went into therapist's office. He has seen her before, but it was a long time ago. She is a welcoming person with a nice demeanor and we were with him. Even so, he couldn't look at her directly and didn't talk much at first. He actually buried his face into the arm of the couch and spoke to her from there. I found that interesting. He is very, very uncomfortable with new people and will try to hide himself from them. At the same time, he did talk and h e talked more as the session went on and he even smiled when she made a joke. But he wouldn't look at her. When she asked if he'd be able to look at her next time, he said, "I don't know."</p><p></p><p>(sigh) Son is going to have to have those services I was hoping he wouldn't need, in spite of having a 3.5 GPA and functioning well in a famliar environment. He's going to need a job he can go to every day that doesn't change much. He is going to need a worker who will look in on him and encourage him to hang out with other people getting services or he will sit home. He has the academic skills, but is still lacking badly in handling himself socially. On the way home he asked, "Am I always going to be so shy?" It broke my heart. I said, "We'll be working on at least making you less shy." Then he said, "I worry a lot about what will happen when you and dad are gone. Like forever. I won't have anyone." I tried not to cry. We have a very small family, spread out. If his sisters won't stay close to him, and I can't predict how they will be once they have their own families, he will have to rely on strangers. We aren't young...I'm 56 and hub is 53. </p><p></p><p>L. has had intense interventions since childhood. He is doing really well for how he started out (angry, tantrumming, poor speech, poor grades). But he still will need some help. I'm not surprised, but I'm sort of sad. On the bright side, he is a nice kid whom everyone loves and whoever works with him with enjoy him. He will try hard to do a good job at work, regardless of the job they find for him. He is a very compliant kid who won't break the law or use drugs or do anything he shouldn't do. That should help him.</p><p></p><p>Just a vent. </p><p></p><p>There is no way to predict how an Aspie will turn out. He may grow up later, but right now he is way behind other kids socially and is not going to be independent for a long time, if ever. </p><p></p><p>At the same time, I'm so proud of his smartness, his sweetness, and his good heart.</p><p></p><p>Parents of older Aspies may understand. Because he functions so well at school and at home I'm always jolted when I see how poorly he does with strangers.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember, post: 357668, member: 1550"] My son is now almost seventeen and, boy, he is going to have to have interventions as an adult. He simply is not going to be ready to face everything at 18. He does GREAT with people he is comfortable with, gets wonderful grades, and even has school friends (although he rarely sees them out of school). I want to explain how a counseling session went. She is my counselor and I wanted her to see him to find out if she feels I should start looking into services for him or if she feels he will be labeled as too high functioning. Plus we had an issue with him that we wanted to discuss. The meeting went like this. First he wouldn't get out of the car, but I left him there, knowing he'd eventually come inside, and he did (before the meeting). Then we (hub, me, son) went into therapist's office. He has seen her before, but it was a long time ago. She is a welcoming person with a nice demeanor and we were with him. Even so, he couldn't look at her directly and didn't talk much at first. He actually buried his face into the arm of the couch and spoke to her from there. I found that interesting. He is very, very uncomfortable with new people and will try to hide himself from them. At the same time, he did talk and h e talked more as the session went on and he even smiled when she made a joke. But he wouldn't look at her. When she asked if he'd be able to look at her next time, he said, "I don't know." (sigh) Son is going to have to have those services I was hoping he wouldn't need, in spite of having a 3.5 GPA and functioning well in a famliar environment. He's going to need a job he can go to every day that doesn't change much. He is going to need a worker who will look in on him and encourage him to hang out with other people getting services or he will sit home. He has the academic skills, but is still lacking badly in handling himself socially. On the way home he asked, "Am I always going to be so shy?" It broke my heart. I said, "We'll be working on at least making you less shy." Then he said, "I worry a lot about what will happen when you and dad are gone. Like forever. I won't have anyone." I tried not to cry. We have a very small family, spread out. If his sisters won't stay close to him, and I can't predict how they will be once they have their own families, he will have to rely on strangers. We aren't young...I'm 56 and hub is 53. L. has had intense interventions since childhood. He is doing really well for how he started out (angry, tantrumming, poor speech, poor grades). But he still will need some help. I'm not surprised, but I'm sort of sad. On the bright side, he is a nice kid whom everyone loves and whoever works with him with enjoy him. He will try hard to do a good job at work, regardless of the job they find for him. He is a very compliant kid who won't break the law or use drugs or do anything he shouldn't do. That should help him. Just a vent. There is no way to predict how an Aspie will turn out. He may grow up later, but right now he is way behind other kids socially and is not going to be independent for a long time, if ever. At the same time, I'm so proud of his smartness, his sweetness, and his good heart. Parents of older Aspies may understand. Because he functions so well at school and at home I'm always jolted when I see how poorly he does with strangers. [/QUOTE]
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Son hiding his face for the entire counseling session (Autism spectrum)
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