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<blockquote data-quote="BusynMember1" data-source="post: 758496" data-attributes="member: 23706"><p>Hi and thanks for updating us. I will give you my two cents and you will do what you want. We all do <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /></p><p></p><p>When Kay was ready to ask for money or other "help'" she was a model daughter, full of kindness and compliments. When she didn't need something from us, she called us by our first names, told us we didn't love her and she would lhave been better off staying in her orphanage, and what hideous parents we were. </p><p></p><p>Every time Kay acted nice and sincere, I fell for it for over ten years, until she turned 30. I would beg my husband, who stopped believing her way before I did, to do what Kay wanted because I would tell him that she has changed and we would fight and he was ALWAYS right....she never changed. I just wanted it to be so. This is a warning to you. Uncanny timing for your son to suddenly apologize. It's what they do and say to get us to give in.</p><p></p><p>But it took me ten years to finally stop letting Kay play me. I don't know for sure that your son is doing what Kay did, but I would make other arrangements if I had had hindsight at the time and if I were you. Those younger kids deserve peace and quiet in their sanctuary, their home.</p><p></p><p>Before you approach your husband, please get calm and think for two days. Talk to a therapist. You are emotional now. That isn't a good time to make a decision. Think about his history. in my opinion he has not gone for help and has not changed at all. in my opinion you also know this, just as I knew Kay was faking her love, at least I knew this deep in the back of my mind. I think your son would need years of intensive therapy before being well enough to safely live in your house. What about his father? Can he stay there to spare the younger kids? May not be the best place to go, but at least your younger kids would be spared.</p><p></p><p>Prayers and hugs. Will be thinking of you and will support your decision.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="BusynMember1, post: 758496, member: 23706"] Hi and thanks for updating us. I will give you my two cents and you will do what you want. We all do :) When Kay was ready to ask for money or other "help'" she was a model daughter, full of kindness and compliments. When she didn't need something from us, she called us by our first names, told us we didn't love her and she would lhave been better off staying in her orphanage, and what hideous parents we were. Every time Kay acted nice and sincere, I fell for it for over ten years, until she turned 30. I would beg my husband, who stopped believing her way before I did, to do what Kay wanted because I would tell him that she has changed and we would fight and he was ALWAYS right....she never changed. I just wanted it to be so. This is a warning to you. Uncanny timing for your son to suddenly apologize. It's what they do and say to get us to give in. But it took me ten years to finally stop letting Kay play me. I don't know for sure that your son is doing what Kay did, but I would make other arrangements if I had had hindsight at the time and if I were you. Those younger kids deserve peace and quiet in their sanctuary, their home. Before you approach your husband, please get calm and think for two days. Talk to a therapist. You are emotional now. That isn't a good time to make a decision. Think about his history. in my opinion he has not gone for help and has not changed at all. in my opinion you also know this, just as I knew Kay was faking her love, at least I knew this deep in the back of my mind. I think your son would need years of intensive therapy before being well enough to safely live in your house. What about his father? Can he stay there to spare the younger kids? May not be the best place to go, but at least your younger kids would be spared. Prayers and hugs. Will be thinking of you and will support your decision. [/QUOTE]
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