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Spouse First? (read second please)
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<blockquote data-quote="hearts and roses" data-source="post: 141243" data-attributes="member: 2211"><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: darkslategray">It's strange, if someone had asked me 5 years ago if I had to choose, would I choose my H over my kids, I'd have said, "No!" but not because he makes me especially more happier than my kids. In fact, it has nothing to do with happiness at all. I would have chosen my kids then because they still needed me. Plain and simple. In my head at that time, I would have thought, "Time enough for H and me later". Wrong. </span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: darkslategray">According to the so-called 'experts', spousal relationships should ALWAYS come before parent/child relationship. And I'm not talking about situations where abuse exists - obviously in that case, the child's safety would always come first. But in a normal family, without abuse, it is believed that if the spousal relationship is strong, then the parenting is easier and tends to run smoother. I don't know if that's true or not because I've been divorced and remarried and those scenarios pose other factors.</span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: darkslategray">Each relationship is so different from one another. It is incomparable in my opinion. </span></span></p><p> </p><p><span style="font-size: 12px"><span style="color: darkslategray">Now that my girls are grown, it had occurred to me that my relationship with H would come first, as after all, both my girls will move on in their lives leaving us in a position not entirely at the top of their list. They will find their SO and move forward, leaving H and me to figure out what to do with one another with all that free time. Hahaha- In recent months, as difficult child has pushed me to the brink, I've come to realize that yes, I do want her out so that H and I could begin living our lives as friends, confidantes, lovers, adventurers. I want to experience that with H, as for him, my girls have always been around and in our lives. We've never had that time before children to experience one another without the kids. It will be a new thing. And at times, a very scary thing.</span></span></p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="hearts and roses, post: 141243, member: 2211"] [SIZE=3][COLOR=darkslategray]It's strange, if someone had asked me 5 years ago if I had to choose, would I choose my H over my kids, I'd have said, "No!" but not because he makes me especially more happier than my kids. In fact, it has nothing to do with happiness at all. I would have chosen my kids then because they still needed me. Plain and simple. In my head at that time, I would have thought, "Time enough for H and me later". Wrong. [/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE=3][COLOR=darkslategray]According to the so-called 'experts', spousal relationships should ALWAYS come before parent/child relationship. And I'm not talking about situations where abuse exists - obviously in that case, the child's safety would always come first. But in a normal family, without abuse, it is believed that if the spousal relationship is strong, then the parenting is easier and tends to run smoother. I don't know if that's true or not because I've been divorced and remarried and those scenarios pose other factors.[/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE=3][COLOR=darkslategray]Each relationship is so different from one another. It is incomparable in my opinion. [/COLOR][/SIZE] [SIZE=3][COLOR=darkslategray]Now that my girls are grown, it had occurred to me that my relationship with H would come first, as after all, both my girls will move on in their lives leaving us in a position not entirely at the top of their list. They will find their SO and move forward, leaving H and me to figure out what to do with one another with all that free time. Hahaha- In recent months, as difficult child has pushed me to the brink, I've come to realize that yes, I do want her out so that H and I could begin living our lives as friends, confidantes, lovers, adventurers. I want to experience that with H, as for him, my girls have always been around and in our lives. We've never had that time before children to experience one another without the kids. It will be a new thing. And at times, a very scary thing.[/COLOR][/SIZE] [/QUOTE]
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