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<blockquote data-quote="TerryJ2" data-source="post: 636336" data-attributes="member: 3419"><p>Plexicos,</p><p>definitely, the ADHD is the controlling factor, no matter what diagnosis he ends up with in the future. What I see from your brief posts is total lack of impulse control.</p><p></p><p>The idea of repeating the same behaviors over and over can be an either/or diagnosis, but in our situation, the consequences had to be huge before our son would learn. "I didn't know you really meant it!" he'd complain ... after the neighbors called the police. (?)</p><p></p><p>He did not understand boundaries, for one. If the neighbor's door was unlocked, and he'd been invited in before, it meant he could go inside any time he chose. Never mind that they weren't home. Never mind that he took things, with the intention of returning them.</p><p>The impulse to live in the moment totally overrode his conscience.</p><p></p><p>Now ... he's pretty much both Aspie Lite and bipolar. Although the psychiatrist hasn't said that aloud. But I can tell you that lithium is not a normal drug to use on Asperger's and it works very well for my son. However, Concerta/Adderal also works, and it's supposed to make bipolar worse.</p><p></p><p>Also, is there an element of anxiety with your difficult child? That can, of course, be related to any future diagnosis, or it can simply be ... anxiety.</p><p></p><p>When I watch my son, he has major anxiety in crowds (missed all but one baseball opening ceremony), total anxiety talking to strangers, anxiety even talking to teachers at school when he needs a homework assignment or clarification, but he took a "risk" by going into the neighbor's house. He has done a lot of odd behaviors (odd as in weird) like urinating and defecating in containers, and wiping stuff on walls, and much of that was ADHD and sensory related. But is that autism? Or is it something else? Either way, he doesn't do it anymore, he's attending school every day, and he's got a job. WTH? No clear pattern.</p><p></p><p>So, there are no easy answers.</p><p></p><p>I would get him tested, no matter what. Keep reading. Keep an eye on him. Be a constant presence for him. And get therapy. My son has had so many issues, I could fill a book. He has gone beyond over half of them. But we have a long way to go. Without medications and therapy, I shudder to think where we would be right now.</p><p></p><p>MWM, I totally forgot about the genetic issues! Lol.</p><p>I understand where you're coming from and I agree, there is ODD there. Again, we have to see what develops as this difficult child grows.</p><p></p><p>You sound like you are a very caring potential stepdad, Plexicos. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> Could you explain what you mean about "something not right" with the father? I mean, I get the born again fundamentalist Jew issue, but what more can you see? Habits? Speech patterns? Anger issues? Sensory issues? Repetition?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="TerryJ2, post: 636336, member: 3419"] Plexicos, definitely, the ADHD is the controlling factor, no matter what diagnosis he ends up with in the future. What I see from your brief posts is total lack of impulse control. The idea of repeating the same behaviors over and over can be an either/or diagnosis, but in our situation, the consequences had to be huge before our son would learn. "I didn't know you really meant it!" he'd complain ... after the neighbors called the police. (?) He did not understand boundaries, for one. If the neighbor's door was unlocked, and he'd been invited in before, it meant he could go inside any time he chose. Never mind that they weren't home. Never mind that he took things, with the intention of returning them. The impulse to live in the moment totally overrode his conscience. Now ... he's pretty much both Aspie Lite and bipolar. Although the psychiatrist hasn't said that aloud. But I can tell you that lithium is not a normal drug to use on Asperger's and it works very well for my son. However, Concerta/Adderal also works, and it's supposed to make bipolar worse. Also, is there an element of anxiety with your difficult child? That can, of course, be related to any future diagnosis, or it can simply be ... anxiety. When I watch my son, he has major anxiety in crowds (missed all but one baseball opening ceremony), total anxiety talking to strangers, anxiety even talking to teachers at school when he needs a homework assignment or clarification, but he took a "risk" by going into the neighbor's house. He has done a lot of odd behaviors (odd as in weird) like urinating and defecating in containers, and wiping stuff on walls, and much of that was ADHD and sensory related. But is that autism? Or is it something else? Either way, he doesn't do it anymore, he's attending school every day, and he's got a job. WTH? No clear pattern. So, there are no easy answers. I would get him tested, no matter what. Keep reading. Keep an eye on him. Be a constant presence for him. And get therapy. My son has had so many issues, I could fill a book. He has gone beyond over half of them. But we have a long way to go. Without medications and therapy, I shudder to think where we would be right now. MWM, I totally forgot about the genetic issues! Lol. I understand where you're coming from and I agree, there is ODD there. Again, we have to see what develops as this difficult child grows. You sound like you are a very caring potential stepdad, Plexicos. :) Could you explain what you mean about "something not right" with the father? I mean, I get the born again fundamentalist Jew issue, but what more can you see? Habits? Speech patterns? Anger issues? Sensory issues? Repetition? [/QUOTE]
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