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Parent Emeritus
stealing, lying
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<blockquote data-quote="susiestar" data-source="post: 377912" data-attributes="member: 1233"><p>Sending many hugs and prayers to you. The wisdom you have been given here is not something I can add to. Toughlovin gave an awesome description of how you can love your child while detaching, as she described kicking him out to live as he chose to live, but still sending him texts of love, and of letting him have clothes or items like that when needed, even though she did not let him move back home, or give him financial support. </p><p> </p><p>Star has given you insight that ONLY a survivor of a long term abusive relationship who has then gotten a LOT of help for herself can give you. Her words truly are words of wisdom. She is not only wise and caring, and a survivor and one he(( of a woman, she is also a gifted writer who conveys her meaning in a way that makes it real and understandable to others. She is a true gift, as is her post to you. </p><p> </p><p>I cannot top this, except to say that of all things you do, make sure you keep coming back here for support, ideas, answers, and caring. Use us to blow off your steam instead of family. We don't get as upset, and we understand, so there is a lot less conflama when you vent here (conflama = conflict + drama). PLEASE go to AL Anon or Narc Anon. Even Parents Anonymous if it exists in your area. They will give you, and your wife, real life support to help you understand this and navigate a path back to healthy living for yourself. Take your wife if you can, but go even if she won't. Commit to 7 in 7 - 7 meetings in 7 days, try different times, etc.. Soon one will begin to be more comfortable and you will realize you are learning to live again.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="susiestar, post: 377912, member: 1233"] Sending many hugs and prayers to you. The wisdom you have been given here is not something I can add to. Toughlovin gave an awesome description of how you can love your child while detaching, as she described kicking him out to live as he chose to live, but still sending him texts of love, and of letting him have clothes or items like that when needed, even though she did not let him move back home, or give him financial support. Star has given you insight that ONLY a survivor of a long term abusive relationship who has then gotten a LOT of help for herself can give you. Her words truly are words of wisdom. She is not only wise and caring, and a survivor and one he(( of a woman, she is also a gifted writer who conveys her meaning in a way that makes it real and understandable to others. She is a true gift, as is her post to you. I cannot top this, except to say that of all things you do, make sure you keep coming back here for support, ideas, answers, and caring. Use us to blow off your steam instead of family. We don't get as upset, and we understand, so there is a lot less conflama when you vent here (conflama = conflict + drama). PLEASE go to AL Anon or Narc Anon. Even Parents Anonymous if it exists in your area. They will give you, and your wife, real life support to help you understand this and navigate a path back to healthy living for yourself. Take your wife if you can, but go even if she won't. Commit to 7 in 7 - 7 meetings in 7 days, try different times, etc.. Soon one will begin to be more comfortable and you will realize you are learning to live again. [/QUOTE]
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