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Step Daughter Stealing
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<blockquote data-quote="Sister's Keeper" data-source="post: 697454" data-attributes="member: 20051"><p>Ugggh, that's a tough one.</p><p></p><p></p><p>This is how it works in our home, too, and we are not well-off, but I don't have adult children living at home. Here things get eaten and not replaced, but my kids are small. (they ate a club sized box of Fiber One brownies not realizing they were "diet food.") </p><p></p><p>I would imagine, though, with some people with adult children at home the dynamic may be different in that adult children may be expected to contribute to the food budget or replace things if they were the ones to consume the whole thing.</p><p></p><p>I think the difference here is that Marty and her husband are used to households that run differently. Add into that an adult child who may not respond appropriately to social cues.</p><p></p><p>I don't think any of this is a huge problem, really, I think it is just a matter of coming to an agreement about how things are run in the household in reference to the adult daughter.</p><p></p><p>I may be assuming, but I am guessing Marty was used to living by herself prior to the marriage. Now she has to share things and add into that an adult child who is socially awkward. It's a lot of adjustment.</p><p></p><p>In regards to the adult daughter's behavior it is probably outside the norm but the husband is used to it so he isn't annoyed or uncomfortable. My example is my littlest one. She has some speech delays so she isn't always able to express herself as quickly as she wants. So she cries. A LOT. We are used to it and we are able to ignore it. It drives my mother in law insane. She sees it as more manipulation than frustration. </p><p></p><p>I think seeing the counselor on your own is a great idea. I agree the amount of alcohol consumed would concern me, but since she is an adult you really can't do much about it other than not give her access to it in your own house, but talking to the counselor may help you sort out some of your feelings, or help you find a better way to cope with the adult daughter's behavior.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Sister's Keeper, post: 697454, member: 20051"] Ugggh, that's a tough one. This is how it works in our home, too, and we are not well-off, but I don't have adult children living at home. Here things get eaten and not replaced, but my kids are small. (they ate a club sized box of Fiber One brownies not realizing they were "diet food.") I would imagine, though, with some people with adult children at home the dynamic may be different in that adult children may be expected to contribute to the food budget or replace things if they were the ones to consume the whole thing. I think the difference here is that Marty and her husband are used to households that run differently. Add into that an adult child who may not respond appropriately to social cues. I don't think any of this is a huge problem, really, I think it is just a matter of coming to an agreement about how things are run in the household in reference to the adult daughter. I may be assuming, but I am guessing Marty was used to living by herself prior to the marriage. Now she has to share things and add into that an adult child who is socially awkward. It's a lot of adjustment. In regards to the adult daughter's behavior it is probably outside the norm but the husband is used to it so he isn't annoyed or uncomfortable. My example is my littlest one. She has some speech delays so she isn't always able to express herself as quickly as she wants. So she cries. A LOT. We are used to it and we are able to ignore it. It drives my mother in law insane. She sees it as more manipulation than frustration. I think seeing the counselor on your own is a great idea. I agree the amount of alcohol consumed would concern me, but since she is an adult you really can't do much about it other than not give her access to it in your own house, but talking to the counselor may help you sort out some of your feelings, or help you find a better way to cope with the adult daughter's behavior. [/QUOTE]
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