Just looking at this again, since the cycle is repeating right now.
I sound so selfish and judgemental toward her here, and I'm sorry. I really didn't feel in control of my life.
I want to be the kind of stepmom that my dad's longtime girlfriend was to me. She was always kind, but always firm, and I respected her so much and did what I was told and LIKED her.
I avoided, ignored, and fought with my stepdad, which was much worse growing up, because I lived with him and my mother. I figure she's going to "like" me a lot less now that she'll be living with us. She only had to tolerate me 4 days a month before. :wink:
Anyway, I'm sorry for how I sound ... I do NOT have contempt for her ... just frustration and fear. It was such a struggle and a journey to get my bio kids out of my former abusive marriage ... and I did it so that my then-3 y.o. bio daughter would not have the environment to overcome that my step daughter has had for 14 years ...
