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Suggestions for low self esteem
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<blockquote data-quote="ShakinThingzUp" data-source="post: 104749" data-attributes="member: 4250"><p>Thanks Star...</p><p></p><p>Hunter doesn't shut down or withdrawl when given compliments - but, I do know what you mean by that... my step daughter did that, and I used the same approach (boomerang compliments, etc). I actually used the boomerang approach in a lot of ways (discussing personal hygeine with a friend in front of her, etc.). She didn't believe anything told directly to her was the truth - compliment or not.</p><p></p><p>My son talks to me when I compliment, he just hen pecks his own "good" qualities or says "No, I'm not" when I tell him he's good at something. He will invariably point out someone who is "better" in his opinion.</p><p></p><p>I think the compliments do settle with him. I just think he doesn't hear it enough - perhaps outside the home... and, I'm also afraid that his bio-dad is doing the opposite when he visits him (putting him down for everything), and it does a lot of damage when he visits him... he doesn't get to see him much, then to hear bad comments it is multiplied.</p><p></p><p>I do wish there was a taekwondo program here like the one he was in. When in a structured class, where the Master is demanding, and then your kid does something exceedingly well, well.. he believed her when she told him good job. He didn't doubt it.... I could just see his chest puffing up!</p><p></p><p>God Bless!</p><p>Amy</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ShakinThingzUp, post: 104749, member: 4250"] Thanks Star... Hunter doesn't shut down or withdrawl when given compliments - but, I do know what you mean by that... my step daughter did that, and I used the same approach (boomerang compliments, etc). I actually used the boomerang approach in a lot of ways (discussing personal hygeine with a friend in front of her, etc.). She didn't believe anything told directly to her was the truth - compliment or not. My son talks to me when I compliment, he just hen pecks his own "good" qualities or says "No, I'm not" when I tell him he's good at something. He will invariably point out someone who is "better" in his opinion. I think the compliments do settle with him. I just think he doesn't hear it enough - perhaps outside the home... and, I'm also afraid that his bio-dad is doing the opposite when he visits him (putting him down for everything), and it does a lot of damage when he visits him... he doesn't get to see him much, then to hear bad comments it is multiplied. I do wish there was a taekwondo program here like the one he was in. When in a structured class, where the Master is demanding, and then your kid does something exceedingly well, well.. he believed her when she told him good job. He didn't doubt it.... I could just see his chest puffing up! God Bless! Amy [/QUOTE]
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