But how many times do you support them and watch them slip before enough is enough? Or are you there to support them indefinitely any time they seem to be moving in the right direction? I am at the point with my 32 year old son that if I have my way, he will never get anything from me again, ever. These kids (or adult kids) are master manipulators who are experts at telling us what we want to hear in order to get what they want. I can't tell you how much time, effort, and money we have put into our son over the years in situations where he said and gave the appearance he was trying to do the right thing, only to see him slip uo yet again shortly thereafter. Every time we trick ourselves into thinking this time will be different, but it never is. The last incident was money my wife gave him for a cell phone earlier this year. He showed up at our house one day all distraught. My wife was glad to see him because he hadn't returned any of her calls. His story was that someone beat him up and stole his smart phone while he was walking down the street. Of course he starts the drama about how he's been pounding the pavement filling out job applications and since his phone got stolen there is no way anyone can contact him about any jobs. He seems to be doing the right thing right? If a potential employer has no way to contact him how can he hope to get a job? So my wife buys him a new phone. No job ever materialized though. Of course they are going to tell us that they are doing the right thing (or that them doing the right thing hinges on us doing something for them). They know well enough that we aren't going to support them if they tell us they have no plans to do the right thing. But even if they are sincenerly trying and slip up, how many times are we supposed to be there to rescue them? After all, we didn't create their messes and our lives weren't a mess when we were their age? I have heard all the BS and hair brained plans over the years and i have had enough. My son is like the proverbial boy who cried wolf. I have heard the BS so much that if and when he sincerely needs help to turn his life around I want nothing to do with it.
