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<blockquote data-quote="Copabanana" data-source="post: 695151" data-attributes="member: 18958"><p>I agree with SWOT here. But I go further. Life is lose/lose. You suffer and then you die. There is no other life. That I know about. If you do, let me know. </p><p></p><p>I have lived my life for myself, in that, I believe I am my own creation. It is not in the main how others treat me but how I respond. Whether or not I respond with integrity and hope and responsibility--or in bitterness and fear and weakness. I think I am at about 50-50. 50 percent hope and 50 percent fear. Maybe I have enough time left in my life to do better.</p><p>You see, I would not see as important<em> the price paid </em>in terms of others.</p><p></p><p>From my way of thinking your daughter's and her dumb husband's behavior and ultimatums do not define you. You define you. And you did good. </p><p></p><p>I think that is where your husband is coming from--and in general, you too. But you are discombulated because your daughter is living poorly--not living up to her potential which is to be the good and excellent person you taught her to be. So you are a little bit off your game, but recovering quickly, if I say so myself!</p><p>How so? I do not see myself giving her any credit at all. I think she is acting lost and miserable and mean. But that does not mean you have to act in kind.</p><p></p><p>I believe that people do come back sometimes. But not when we want them to and need them to.</p><p></p><p>My sister never did. But then I never did my part either. I judged her. I stayed away. I did not take the high road. I did not give her a hand. I send her a birthday note every year. Maybe someday she will respond. I cannot change the past. But I can change me, now.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Copabanana, post: 695151, member: 18958"] I agree with SWOT here. But I go further. Life is lose/lose. You suffer and then you die. There is no other life. That I know about. If you do, let me know. I have lived my life for myself, in that, I believe I am my own creation. It is not in the main how others treat me but how I respond. Whether or not I respond with integrity and hope and responsibility--or in bitterness and fear and weakness. I think I am at about 50-50. 50 percent hope and 50 percent fear. Maybe I have enough time left in my life to do better. You see, I would not see as important[I] the price paid [/I]in terms of others. From my way of thinking your daughter's and her dumb husband's behavior and ultimatums do not define you. You define you. And you did good. I think that is where your husband is coming from--and in general, you too. But you are discombulated because your daughter is living poorly--not living up to her potential which is to be the good and excellent person you taught her to be. So you are a little bit off your game, but recovering quickly, if I say so myself! How so? I do not see myself giving her any credit at all. I think she is acting lost and miserable and mean. But that does not mean you have to act in kind. I believe that people do come back sometimes. But not when we want them to and need them to. My sister never did. But then I never did my part either. I judged her. I stayed away. I did not take the high road. I did not give her a hand. I send her a birthday note every year. Maybe someday she will respond. I cannot change the past. But I can change me, now. [/QUOTE]
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