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<blockquote data-quote="dreamer" data-source="post: 134816" data-attributes="member: 1697"><p>People get stuff into thinking only their own way is the right way. My mother in law used to complain to me before I had kids- said "young people do not want to wait for things" Easy for HER to say- I was working 3 jobs, supporting her entirely, PLUS her ex husband and dhs sister and 2 kids. My husband was NOT working, I was a waitress, - we had one very old car, lived in the worst apatments in the entire chicago suburbs, had no tv, no stove....I was 30 years old. She said it to me becuz I had the audacity to want a child. And to do so, I might hafta reduce what I gave HER. Then I found out she had 3 cars! (she lived out of state) and she had a Duckie telephone, and 3 brand new TVs! (all paid for by me) </p><p></p><p>Then she told me I was commiting sin becuz I worked Sundays. Nevermind SUndays were our busy day due to after church sunday brunch. Nevermind how many people I was single handedly supporting. </p><p></p><p>When my first child was born, I did get to stop working briefly. I loved it, but alas, then my husband got sick.....and I had no choice. I wound up working 2 full time jobs ---to feed us, shelter us etc. </p><p>By then mother in law and father in law had passed away. </p><p></p><p>By then my sister decided to toss HER 2 cents in, and told me time and again how neglectful I was to work. I asked her how else she thought my children would have a bed to sleep in and food to eat? </p><p>Ironically, 15 years later she became a mother- and while she is a stay at home mom, she ships HER kids off to all her in laws and friends for a week at a time, while she jet sets all over the country. Hm, when I was not at work, I spent EVERY moment WITH my kids. </p><p>Hmm, now I am too disabled to work. My disability did not CARE we NEEDED my work income. Our life changed dramatically. </p><p>Again. </p><p></p><p>Yeah, now I am a stay at home mom. And my mom, before she died, bless her heart- asked me how dare I subject my kids to me being disabled? Um..gee, I do not think I have any CHOICE? </p><p>I am finding out that I miss working a LOT. I feel so isolated. SO unfulfilled. So broke. Bored some days. </p><p></p><p>People do what they do, others judge people becuz maybe they do not have enough going on in their own life to keep them busy enough? </p><p></p><p>There was a short time I worked and..UG! My paycheck was smaller than the deductions taken out for health insurance! </p><p>There was also a time when childcare cost more than I made. </p><p>There was a short time when me and husband worked different shifts, - dureing the short time he COULD work---annd WE never saw each other. I had people judge THAT decision, too. They said it was "bad for our marriage" Hmm.so is being hungry. or homeless. Or leaving young children home alone.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="dreamer, post: 134816, member: 1697"] People get stuff into thinking only their own way is the right way. My mother in law used to complain to me before I had kids- said "young people do not want to wait for things" Easy for HER to say- I was working 3 jobs, supporting her entirely, PLUS her ex husband and dhs sister and 2 kids. My husband was NOT working, I was a waitress, - we had one very old car, lived in the worst apatments in the entire chicago suburbs, had no tv, no stove....I was 30 years old. She said it to me becuz I had the audacity to want a child. And to do so, I might hafta reduce what I gave HER. Then I found out she had 3 cars! (she lived out of state) and she had a Duckie telephone, and 3 brand new TVs! (all paid for by me) Then she told me I was commiting sin becuz I worked Sundays. Nevermind SUndays were our busy day due to after church sunday brunch. Nevermind how many people I was single handedly supporting. When my first child was born, I did get to stop working briefly. I loved it, but alas, then my husband got sick.....and I had no choice. I wound up working 2 full time jobs ---to feed us, shelter us etc. By then mother in law and father in law had passed away. By then my sister decided to toss HER 2 cents in, and told me time and again how neglectful I was to work. I asked her how else she thought my children would have a bed to sleep in and food to eat? Ironically, 15 years later she became a mother- and while she is a stay at home mom, she ships HER kids off to all her in laws and friends for a week at a time, while she jet sets all over the country. Hm, when I was not at work, I spent EVERY moment WITH my kids. Hmm, now I am too disabled to work. My disability did not CARE we NEEDED my work income. Our life changed dramatically. Again. Yeah, now I am a stay at home mom. And my mom, before she died, bless her heart- asked me how dare I subject my kids to me being disabled? Um..gee, I do not think I have any CHOICE? I am finding out that I miss working a LOT. I feel so isolated. SO unfulfilled. So broke. Bored some days. People do what they do, others judge people becuz maybe they do not have enough going on in their own life to keep them busy enough? There was a short time I worked and..UG! My paycheck was smaller than the deductions taken out for health insurance! There was also a time when childcare cost more than I made. There was a short time when me and husband worked different shifts, - dureing the short time he COULD work---annd WE never saw each other. I had people judge THAT decision, too. They said it was "bad for our marriage" Hmm.so is being hungry. or homeless. Or leaving young children home alone. [/QUOTE]
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