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Parent Emeritus
the complicated way forward even when things get better
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<blockquote data-quote="Childofmine" data-source="post: 649592" data-attributes="member: 17542"><p>My son's rapid decline started when he was 19. I did a lot of "helping" for a long time and his behavior got worse and worse. Finally he had to leave my house---he was playing at college---a lot of money went down the drain. Finally the severity of the problems started to become very clear with his first arrest and his girlfriend calling me to come over to talk. I had no idea what he was really doing until then. They have an incredible ability to keep us in the dark and we go along with it very well for a very long time. We are usually the last to know the real story and then there is still so much we never know. And I don't need to know it now. My son "didn't have a problem" through all of this. He had it "under control." That is what all addicts and alcoholics think and until they think differently it will not change. Warm hugs to you and welcome. We are here for you. We are all struggling together and there is tremendous comfort in that.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Childofmine, post: 649592, member: 17542"] My son's rapid decline started when he was 19. I did a lot of "helping" for a long time and his behavior got worse and worse. Finally he had to leave my house---he was playing at college---a lot of money went down the drain. Finally the severity of the problems started to become very clear with his first arrest and his girlfriend calling me to come over to talk. I had no idea what he was really doing until then. They have an incredible ability to keep us in the dark and we go along with it very well for a very long time. We are usually the last to know the real story and then there is still so much we never know. And I don't need to know it now. My son "didn't have a problem" through all of this. He had it "under control." That is what all addicts and alcoholics think and until they think differently it will not change. Warm hugs to you and welcome. We are here for you. We are all struggling together and there is tremendous comfort in that. [/QUOTE]
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the complicated way forward even when things get better
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