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The double edged sword of learning to detach...
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<blockquote data-quote="Hound dog" data-source="post: 338481" data-attributes="member: 84"><p>What ever happened to the mother of the bride paying for the wedding? Isn't that what the "tradition" is supposed to be??</p><p></p><p>While all mouths are gaping open........I'll chime in to add that I always though it was ridiculous for either the bride or groom to expect parents to pay for any of their wedding. If you're that hard up for money, kiddos you don't need to be getting married. lol</p><p></p><p>husband and I got married 2 weeks after he proposed. (yes, my mother claimed to be near a heart attack or stroke many times in that 2 weeks) We made all the arrangements ourselves. We paid cash for everything. I never did figure out what all Mom's drama was over as she really had nothing to do. Although I did ask her to come with me to pick my wedding gown. (bought with my money) A beautiful off the shoulder dress with a long trail that cost me 150.00 on clearance from the season before. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite1" alt=":)" title="Smile :)" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":)" /> Normally that dress ran at least 1000.00!!</p><p></p><p>When easy child married sister in law I just smiled alot. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite8" alt=":D" title="Big Grin :D" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":D" /> I did help her pick out her dress though and her now mother in law came along too. The wedding was paid for via sister in law's grandpa and grandma who had put forth the offer so the kids would be married before Darrin was born just a few days later. lol But grandma and grandpa had to really push the kids into accepting their offer and that it was completely sincere. Their wedding present to the kids. sister in law's and easy child's present to <strong>them</strong> was making everything as inexpensive as humanly possible.</p><p></p><p>My kids know I won't put forth money for any of their weddings due to my own firm belief as stated above. They seem to agree with me, so no troubles. lol</p><p></p><p>Leave your check book at home and go have <em><strong>fun</strong></em>. This is the time for that family bonding you've been craving for all these years. Time to begin your relationship with your soon to be daughter in law. And I hope you two grow as close as I am with my own mother in law. (I think of her as the Mom I always wanted)</p><p></p><p>If you discuss it with husband and decide you'd like to do something special for the kids.......nothing wrong with that. Just approach it as you're giving a gift. It's the thought that counts and let it go at that.</p><p></p><p>I have to chuckle. I've had my wedding gown tucked safely away sealed in plastic since the day after husband and I got married 27 years ago. (a gift from a friend to preserve the dress in like new condition until it could be wore by my daughters) easy child couldn't wear it on her wedding day as she was nine months preggers.......and big as a house! So I've told Nichole she has <strong>no choice</strong> but to wear my gown. I haven't been saving it all these years for nothing. lol And I know it will fit. She is an inch shorter than me and weighs what I did all those years ago. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/Graemlins/rofl.gif" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":rofl:" title="rofl :rofl:" data-shortname=":rofl:" /></p><p></p><p>To make me feel better.......easy child wore the same cameo necklace and bracelet belonging to my grandma that I wore on my wedding day. (it was her something Old) And Nichole will wear it on hers too.</p><p></p><p>Weddings are fun. Let it be a fun time for all of you.</p><p></p><p>Hugs</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Hound dog, post: 338481, member: 84"] What ever happened to the mother of the bride paying for the wedding? Isn't that what the "tradition" is supposed to be?? While all mouths are gaping open........I'll chime in to add that I always though it was ridiculous for either the bride or groom to expect parents to pay for any of their wedding. If you're that hard up for money, kiddos you don't need to be getting married. lol husband and I got married 2 weeks after he proposed. (yes, my mother claimed to be near a heart attack or stroke many times in that 2 weeks) We made all the arrangements ourselves. We paid cash for everything. I never did figure out what all Mom's drama was over as she really had nothing to do. Although I did ask her to come with me to pick my wedding gown. (bought with my money) A beautiful off the shoulder dress with a long trail that cost me 150.00 on clearance from the season before. :) Normally that dress ran at least 1000.00!! When easy child married sister in law I just smiled alot. :D I did help her pick out her dress though and her now mother in law came along too. The wedding was paid for via sister in law's grandpa and grandma who had put forth the offer so the kids would be married before Darrin was born just a few days later. lol But grandma and grandpa had to really push the kids into accepting their offer and that it was completely sincere. Their wedding present to the kids. sister in law's and easy child's present to [B]them[/B] was making everything as inexpensive as humanly possible. My kids know I won't put forth money for any of their weddings due to my own firm belief as stated above. They seem to agree with me, so no troubles. lol Leave your check book at home and go have [I][B]fun[/B][/I]. This is the time for that family bonding you've been craving for all these years. Time to begin your relationship with your soon to be daughter in law. And I hope you two grow as close as I am with my own mother in law. (I think of her as the Mom I always wanted) If you discuss it with husband and decide you'd like to do something special for the kids.......nothing wrong with that. Just approach it as you're giving a gift. It's the thought that counts and let it go at that. I have to chuckle. I've had my wedding gown tucked safely away sealed in plastic since the day after husband and I got married 27 years ago. (a gift from a friend to preserve the dress in like new condition until it could be wore by my daughters) easy child couldn't wear it on her wedding day as she was nine months preggers.......and big as a house! So I've told Nichole she has [B]no choice[/B] but to wear my gown. I haven't been saving it all these years for nothing. lol And I know it will fit. She is an inch shorter than me and weighs what I did all those years ago. :rofl: To make me feel better.......easy child wore the same cameo necklace and bracelet belonging to my grandma that I wore on my wedding day. (it was her something Old) And Nichole will wear it on hers too. Weddings are fun. Let it be a fun time for all of you. Hugs [/QUOTE]
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