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I found the point of the book was to help me be able to be a more effective parent to my child. That certainly wasn't happening when our house was a battle zone. Things that are a "c" now don't need to stay there forever. It's a matter of stopping the constant fighting because your child is incapable of doing so. My daughter must have felt so defensive and ***this close*** to a meltdown all the time before I started to concentrate on the most important things. Then, we were able to work on the next most important set, and so on. The good news is that she has improved so much that most would never think she's a difficult child. Plus, I get the added benefit of being a parent rather than a drill sergeant to her.