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General Parenting
The Journey of difficult child - 5000 Miles in 3 Months
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<blockquote data-quote="klmno" data-source="post: 212762" data-attributes="member: 3699"><p>Steely, I have read it. I can only say that I am so very sorry that you and Matt have had to go through all this. It is our system- it is broken. I understand that you've had a tremendous weight on your shoulders this past year and that Matt needs to find his own way of dealing with his own issues, but it is still so senseless that it should take a person going through such a guinia pig trial and error phase to get there. I can't imagine the pain either of you have dealt with in this process.</p><p></p><p>I'm glad you've written this much- I ope it helps you. And please know, you are justified in feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, and extremely hurt. This isn't your fault or Matt's. Unfortunately, it's just the cards you both are dealt and there apparently is no better help right now. On the good side, he's doing the best he can and finding his own way to deal with a mixed up world. You have stayed strong and been there for him and tried to take care of yourself and him. You should be very proud of both of you for this.</p><p></p><p>I'm not in the most positive spirits right now but I look to your situation with Matt for strength. I see that I can make it through you and that my son can make it through what Matt is doing. I honestly believe that many parents on this board are so frustrated with their kids many times only to remember that their kid has an issue that is beyond anyone's control and the parent reflects and knows not to blame the kid for it, but the bigger problem is that there is no one who can readily step in and help either the parent or the kid.</p><p></p><p>You've done the best you can. It really sounds like Matt is doing the best he can. I hope (and believe) that you both will stay strong and become even closer through this process. You had to do what you did. If you hadn't, GD only knows what might have happened to you and where that might have ended Matt. Neither of you wanted that.</p><p></p><p>And the psychiatrists and tdocs- well, let's face it- no matter what education or intelligence they have, they don't understand it if they haven't walked in those shoes as either a parent or a person with a serious issue. They just don't get it. Period. You have always fought for what you know to be the best and right answer. That is the right thing. Don't ever stop.</p><p></p><p>PS By Matt's actions lately, it is apparent that you've taught him to never give up, too. That's one of the most important lessons you could ever teach, as I'm sure you know. I'm just sorry that after so many years of people struggling to get mental health treatment, they still have to go through so much BS to get something half-way right.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="klmno, post: 212762, member: 3699"] Steely, I have read it. I can only say that I am so very sorry that you and Matt have had to go through all this. It is our system- it is broken. I understand that you've had a tremendous weight on your shoulders this past year and that Matt needs to find his own way of dealing with his own issues, but it is still so senseless that it should take a person going through such a guinia pig trial and error phase to get there. I can't imagine the pain either of you have dealt with in this process. I'm glad you've written this much- I ope it helps you. And please know, you are justified in feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, and extremely hurt. This isn't your fault or Matt's. Unfortunately, it's just the cards you both are dealt and there apparently is no better help right now. On the good side, he's doing the best he can and finding his own way to deal with a mixed up world. You have stayed strong and been there for him and tried to take care of yourself and him. You should be very proud of both of you for this. I'm not in the most positive spirits right now but I look to your situation with Matt for strength. I see that I can make it through you and that my son can make it through what Matt is doing. I honestly believe that many parents on this board are so frustrated with their kids many times only to remember that their kid has an issue that is beyond anyone's control and the parent reflects and knows not to blame the kid for it, but the bigger problem is that there is no one who can readily step in and help either the parent or the kid. You've done the best you can. It really sounds like Matt is doing the best he can. I hope (and believe) that you both will stay strong and become even closer through this process. You had to do what you did. If you hadn't, GD only knows what might have happened to you and where that might have ended Matt. Neither of you wanted that. And the psychiatrists and tdocs- well, let's face it- no matter what education or intelligence they have, they don't understand it if they haven't walked in those shoes as either a parent or a person with a serious issue. They just don't get it. Period. You have always fought for what you know to be the best and right answer. That is the right thing. Don't ever stop. PS By Matt's actions lately, it is apparent that you've taught him to never give up, too. That's one of the most important lessons you could ever teach, as I'm sure you know. I'm just sorry that after so many years of people struggling to get mental health treatment, they still have to go through so much BS to get something half-way right. [/QUOTE]
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