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There is a WRONG way to handle a difficult child
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<blockquote data-quote="ThreeShadows" data-source="post: 352866" data-attributes="member: 6370"><p><a href="http://adoption.state.gov/index.php" target="_blank">http://adoption.state.gov/index.php</a></p><p></p><p>I was shocked to see that Russia is not on the list of Hague Convention countries.</p><p></p><p>Many other nations adopt from foreign countries.</p><p></p><p></p><p></p><p>In 1996 we went to the Ural mountains to meet our daughter. We were supposed to stay there 10 days, according to our agency "the law says 21 days but they are letting them go after ten days". Well, this was this particular judge's first adoption and he followed the law. Thank goodness we had lived in NY long enough to believe in the belt+suspenders principle of taking enough money to survive in Russia for 21 days. The other couple was from Chicago and was unprepared. The husband had to go back to the States and I was sorry to tell his wife that "no, we can't lend you any money, we have barely enough for our own stay". That felt really bad.</p><p></p><p>The court system could not process adoptions fast enough BECAUSE THEY DIDN'T HAVE ENOUGH PAPER!!! All those little kids were waiting longer than necessary because of some stupid lack of supplies. Just before we went through the courtroom door a woman asked us "so how come you didn't come last month? What happened?". We were flabbergasted. We could have brought her home when she was 8 months! One less month of her lying on her back waiting for someone to call Mama.</p><p></p><p>We did a Russian adoption and a few months later we adopted her in the USA. If the process is still the same this 7 y.o. boy had to be a US citizen.</p><p></p><p>The article doesn't state if he had spent his entire life in an orphanage, he might have been taken away from abusive parents. Who knows what is the truth? Look at the fact that our agency was not following procedure by telling us we could circumvent the law. The Russian court did not follow procedure by failing to tell us that we could come get her at 8 mos.</p><p></p><p>I feel lousy and furious, once you put that child's picture up on your family fridge while you are waiting for the okay to pick her up, the dream becomes a reality. I can't imagine how all those waiting families must feel right now!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="ThreeShadows, post: 352866, member: 6370"] [url]http://adoption.state.gov/index.php[/url] I was shocked to see that Russia is not on the list of Hague Convention countries. Many other nations adopt from foreign countries. In 1996 we went to the Ural mountains to meet our daughter. We were supposed to stay there 10 days, according to our agency "the law says 21 days but they are letting them go after ten days". Well, this was this particular judge's first adoption and he followed the law. Thank goodness we had lived in NY long enough to believe in the belt+suspenders principle of taking enough money to survive in Russia for 21 days. The other couple was from Chicago and was unprepared. The husband had to go back to the States and I was sorry to tell his wife that "no, we can't lend you any money, we have barely enough for our own stay". That felt really bad. The court system could not process adoptions fast enough BECAUSE THEY DIDN'T HAVE ENOUGH PAPER!!! All those little kids were waiting longer than necessary because of some stupid lack of supplies. Just before we went through the courtroom door a woman asked us "so how come you didn't come last month? What happened?". We were flabbergasted. We could have brought her home when she was 8 months! One less month of her lying on her back waiting for someone to call Mama. We did a Russian adoption and a few months later we adopted her in the USA. If the process is still the same this 7 y.o. boy had to be a US citizen. The article doesn't state if he had spent his entire life in an orphanage, he might have been taken away from abusive parents. Who knows what is the truth? Look at the fact that our agency was not following procedure by telling us we could circumvent the law. The Russian court did not follow procedure by failing to tell us that we could come get her at 8 mos. I feel lousy and furious, once you put that child's picture up on your family fridge while you are waiting for the okay to pick her up, the dream becomes a reality. I can't imagine how all those waiting families must feel right now! [/QUOTE]
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