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Parent Emeritus
These last miles are a bear
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<blockquote data-quote="Coookie" data-source="post: 120416" data-attributes="member: 1587"><p>Oh Sue, </p><p> </p><p>Your thread brought tears to my eyes. <img src="data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP///yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" class="smilie smilie--sprite smilie--sprite3" alt=":(" title="Frown :(" loading="lazy" data-shortname=":(" /> You exoressed feelings that I have felt over and over again. </p><p> </p><p>With me I had to change the way I think. It is a process that is continuing daily. Not engaging is a huge part of that process, and I found with my difficult child when I didn't offer info.... he would ask which made it easier for him to listen I guess. It didn't happen all in one day... and I believe it will be a lifelong thing.</p><p> </p><p>I know your heart is breaking, that you wish things were different... that is a wish we all have too.</p><p> </p><p>Sometimes taking it a minute at a time helped me. Was there anything I could do to change the situation now.... the answer was usually No!</p><p> </p><p>I have come to believe that the pain of a mother's heart is almost indescribable. Not that dad's don't feel pain, not saying that.... but I believe we are wired differently and wounds, especially when it comes to our difficult children, are deep.</p><p> </p><p>Sorry, guess I'm just rambling but I understand your pain. <img src="/community/styles/default/xenforo/smilies/felttip/brokenheart.png" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":brokenheart:" title="brokenheart :brokenheart:" data-shortname=":brokenheart:" /></p><p> </p><p>Sending gentle hugs</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Coookie, post: 120416, member: 1587"] Oh Sue, Your thread brought tears to my eyes. :frowny: You exoressed feelings that I have felt over and over again. With me I had to change the way I think. It is a process that is continuing daily. Not engaging is a huge part of that process, and I found with my difficult child when I didn't offer info.... he would ask which made it easier for him to listen I guess. It didn't happen all in one day... and I believe it will be a lifelong thing. I know your heart is breaking, that you wish things were different... that is a wish we all have too. Sometimes taking it a minute at a time helped me. Was there anything I could do to change the situation now.... the answer was usually No! I have come to believe that the pain of a mother's heart is almost indescribable. Not that dad's don't feel pain, not saying that.... but I believe we are wired differently and wounds, especially when it comes to our difficult children, are deep. Sorry, guess I'm just rambling but I understand your pain. :brokenheart: Sending gentle hugs [/QUOTE]
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