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Parent Emeritus
This has been gnawing at me...
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<blockquote data-quote="Deni D" data-source="post: 747702" data-attributes="member: 22840"><p>I’m in the camp of “less is more” on this one. I am the target of my son’s blame for his issues. I was also the target when his father was unstable. Most likely there will be no getting through to your son on your differences of opinion. I would try to just state to the counselor how you see things very differently but don’t want to spend your time debating reality because it seems futile and let the counselor lead the discussion or lack of from there.</p><p></p><p>I really don’t think it would be a good idea to bring your husband to the next session. This is only from my point of view with my feelings as someone who is being used as a scapegoat for my son’s bad behavior. I literally shake when I think about going to family therapy with my son at this point. I don’t want to be put in a position to have to defend myself against total bs with the possibility of a third party thinking the truth is somewhere in the middle and we just have “communication problems” or some other nonsense.</p><p></p><p>Bottom line is your son is not taking responsibility for his current situation in life. I don’t know how a counselor would successfully handle it but I have feeling it won’t start with them trying to correct his view of reality. I think it would be more along the lines of them showing concern and empathy with him for his “life story” and then nudging him along with whatever seems right for him to start to become the master of his own life. Does he have one on one counseling with that particular counselor?</p><p></p><p>On that app thing, good call, yeah no to that. Geez, good thing we are not as stupid as they think we are.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Deni D, post: 747702, member: 22840"] I’m in the camp of “less is more” on this one. I am the target of my son’s blame for his issues. I was also the target when his father was unstable. Most likely there will be no getting through to your son on your differences of opinion. I would try to just state to the counselor how you see things very differently but don’t want to spend your time debating reality because it seems futile and let the counselor lead the discussion or lack of from there. I really don’t think it would be a good idea to bring your husband to the next session. This is only from my point of view with my feelings as someone who is being used as a scapegoat for my son’s bad behavior. I literally shake when I think about going to family therapy with my son at this point. I don’t want to be put in a position to have to defend myself against total bs with the possibility of a third party thinking the truth is somewhere in the middle and we just have “communication problems” or some other nonsense. Bottom line is your son is not taking responsibility for his current situation in life. I don’t know how a counselor would successfully handle it but I have feeling it won’t start with them trying to correct his view of reality. I think it would be more along the lines of them showing concern and empathy with him for his “life story” and then nudging him along with whatever seems right for him to start to become the master of his own life. Does he have one on one counseling with that particular counselor? On that app thing, good call, yeah no to that. Geez, good thing we are not as stupid as they think we are. [/QUOTE]
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This has been gnawing at me...
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