Forums
New posts
Search forums
What's new
New posts
New profile posts
Latest activity
Internet Search
Members
Current visitors
New profile posts
Search profile posts
Log in
Register
What's new
Search
Search
Search titles only
By:
New posts
Search forums
Menu
Log in
Register
Install the app
Install
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
This has been gnawing at me...
JavaScript is disabled. For a better experience, please enable JavaScript in your browser before proceeding.
You are using an out of date browser. It may not display this or other websites correctly.
You should upgrade or use an
alternative browser
.
Reply to thread
Message
<blockquote data-quote="recoveringenabler" data-source="post: 747704" data-attributes="member: 13542"><p>I have a different point of view. Your son is entitled to his opinion and his perceptions. Many people enter therapy with the sole purpose of assigning blame, not to address their issues, so I think it's something the therapist has seen many times before, particularly where substance abuse is present. If you have a good therapist, and that is an important IF, he/she will appropriately address these issues. Your son is in the blaming stage, not yet ready to be accountable for his actions. However, he is expressing himself.</p><p></p><p>While your son has his perceptions, yours are as important and you need to express them. You disagree with his perceptions, state that. </p><p></p><p>Your husband's alcoholism may have impacted your son in ways that did not impact you. Substance abuse is insidious. Alcoholism impacts each individual in a family differently. </p><p></p><p>I have a friend whose perception of her family life as a child is of a wonderful, carefree, loving home life. However, her older brother saw their Dad's drinking as a huge problem, so bad that he disengaged from the entire family. She said her Dad only drank x amount of drinks per day and it had no impact on her at all. But it had a huge impact on her brother. Just as an aside, her brother is not a jerk, he is a successful Doctor. Perception. Who is right? Perhaps they both are.</p><p></p><p>I think the app issue is a separate issue to deal with. My granddaughter uses an app to shift money around easily, all the young people use it, it isn't nefarious, it's just easier. Your son's intention may be nefarious, but the apps aren't necessarily so. </p><p></p><p>If it were me, I would set up another family session and state my own perceptions of the truth, try my darnedest not to take what he says personally and respond with my own truth........ and be open to what the next step is.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="recoveringenabler, post: 747704, member: 13542"] I have a different point of view. Your son is entitled to his opinion and his perceptions. Many people enter therapy with the sole purpose of assigning blame, not to address their issues, so I think it's something the therapist has seen many times before, particularly where substance abuse is present. If you have a good therapist, and that is an important IF, he/she will appropriately address these issues. Your son is in the blaming stage, not yet ready to be accountable for his actions. However, he is expressing himself. While your son has his perceptions, yours are as important and you need to express them. You disagree with his perceptions, state that. Your husband's alcoholism may have impacted your son in ways that did not impact you. Substance abuse is insidious. Alcoholism impacts each individual in a family differently. I have a friend whose perception of her family life as a child is of a wonderful, carefree, loving home life. However, her older brother saw their Dad's drinking as a huge problem, so bad that he disengaged from the entire family. She said her Dad only drank x amount of drinks per day and it had no impact on her at all. But it had a huge impact on her brother. Just as an aside, her brother is not a jerk, he is a successful Doctor. Perception. Who is right? Perhaps they both are. I think the app issue is a separate issue to deal with. My granddaughter uses an app to shift money around easily, all the young people use it, it isn't nefarious, it's just easier. Your son's intention may be nefarious, but the apps aren't necessarily so. If it were me, I would set up another family session and state my own perceptions of the truth, try my darnedest not to take what he says personally and respond with my own truth........ and be open to what the next step is. [/QUOTE]
Insert quotes…
Verification
Post reply
Forums
Parent Support Forums
Parent Emeritus
This has been gnawing at me...
Top