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<blockquote data-quote="exhausted" data-source="post: 485673" data-attributes="member: 11001"><p>Malika,</p><p>Sorry I am so late to this thread-busy week. I agree not to make this huge. Boys are aggressive, and J may or may not be within normal limits-it sounds as if J is not sure how to handle his frustrations and yes probably disappointment in himself. I agree that you should use the strategies that work for you-maybe giving him some ideas for stategies to handle the frustration. Aggression towards you is not one of those-good on you for walking away!</p><p></p><p>The only this I would add is that when my son was young, there were only 2 boys in the emmediate area. At the time we went to church regularly and these boys were part of that. They just were not a good fit for our son. Actually, one of them often took things from our son, made fun of him etc. My son got mad and defended himself, not always in the ways we had hoped mind you.</p><p> Can you imagine how tough it must be for J to have only one boy to choose from in the group? At this age they are usually in same sex groups-not a whole lot of boy/girl play in my experience in schools. We expect them to get along and play nice, but if the fit isn't real good, it would make a love/hate thing! If I could do anything different raising my kids, I would have sold our home and moved them out of this neighborhood. I think friends, proximity, and choices of friends are that important. In the end it has caused many issues.(Not that any are to blame for my kid's diagnosis-just that there were so few kids my kids' ages and this neighborhood is working class, and not a whole lot of social graces when problem solving was necessary) At some point, other kids have a lot of power. They really have a great amount of power on the formation of self-esteem, beliefs, etc. My wish is that J would have other friend choices at school.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="exhausted, post: 485673, member: 11001"] Malika, Sorry I am so late to this thread-busy week. I agree not to make this huge. Boys are aggressive, and J may or may not be within normal limits-it sounds as if J is not sure how to handle his frustrations and yes probably disappointment in himself. I agree that you should use the strategies that work for you-maybe giving him some ideas for stategies to handle the frustration. Aggression towards you is not one of those-good on you for walking away! The only this I would add is that when my son was young, there were only 2 boys in the emmediate area. At the time we went to church regularly and these boys were part of that. They just were not a good fit for our son. Actually, one of them often took things from our son, made fun of him etc. My son got mad and defended himself, not always in the ways we had hoped mind you. Can you imagine how tough it must be for J to have only one boy to choose from in the group? At this age they are usually in same sex groups-not a whole lot of boy/girl play in my experience in schools. We expect them to get along and play nice, but if the fit isn't real good, it would make a love/hate thing! If I could do anything different raising my kids, I would have sold our home and moved them out of this neighborhood. I think friends, proximity, and choices of friends are that important. In the end it has caused many issues.(Not that any are to blame for my kid's diagnosis-just that there were so few kids my kids' ages and this neighborhood is working class, and not a whole lot of social graces when problem solving was necessary) At some point, other kids have a lot of power. They really have a great amount of power on the formation of self-esteem, beliefs, etc. My wish is that J would have other friend choices at school. [/QUOTE]
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