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<blockquote data-quote="Marguerite" data-source="post: 170360" data-attributes="member: 1991"><p>Totoro, you wrote, "This teacher at least stuck up for the parents a bit, he did not need to."</p><p></p><p>I was getting ready to write this reply even before I saw that teacher had joined our ranks. Also please be aware, in case I get things wrong - things are a little different in Australia, but I think I have got the gist of how it works for you, at least in this case.</p><p></p><p>Totoro, I think teacher's apparent support for the organising parents, at least in part, was darn good strategy. If you're going to go in criticising someone for their stand, going in with all guns blazing and giving absolutely no quarter can lower you to their level and to an outsider, it looks too much like a mirror image situation - both as bad as each other; why would I want to get involved?</p><p></p><p>But when you go in with the kindness and tact that was NOT displayed by the group you are criticising, you get more attention from people who value fair play.</p><p></p><p>What teacher was saying (and please correct me, teacher, if I've got you wrong) was that credit needs to be given to those who worked really hard, because to organise an event like this is a huge task; BUT (and I wish I could make that word bigger) that no amount of such hard work gives ANYONE the right to hold (and enforce) such a narrow-minded opinion.</p><p></p><p>In saying it this way, teacher is ensuring that the organisers can't come back with that argument of "you don't know how hard I worked on this - and to be told we have to share it with those lowlifes is just not fair to me and the other parents who all worked so hard!"</p><p>Teacher has already knocked those arguments on the head before they ever get the chance to be uttered.</p><p></p><p>It's a very effective way of negotiating and of registering your complaint in a public forum. If you can make it clear that you HAVE considered ALL points of view and you still cannot see how anybody could be so mean, then you will win far more otherwise impartial observers over to your point of view.</p><p></p><p>If you don't do this, you risk ending up looking like Hatfields vs McCoys, with anybody not involved not even wanting to know about the problem.</p><p></p><p></p><p>It sounds to me like there is plenty of scope for making a lot of trouble for the people who organised things in such a mean and thoughtless way. Go for it. I would be asking for an apology for the exclusion, as well as an apology from the people who publicly voiced such bigotry.</p><p></p><p>This isn't just about unfair exclusion, it's about removal of CHOICE. </p><p></p><p>And teacher - welcome. And good on you. You are a brave person as well as a master of diplomacy and effective negotiation. Well done. Are you available for cloning?</p><p></p><p>Marg</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Marguerite, post: 170360, member: 1991"] Totoro, you wrote, "This teacher at least stuck up for the parents a bit, he did not need to." I was getting ready to write this reply even before I saw that teacher had joined our ranks. Also please be aware, in case I get things wrong - things are a little different in Australia, but I think I have got the gist of how it works for you, at least in this case. Totoro, I think teacher's apparent support for the organising parents, at least in part, was darn good strategy. If you're going to go in criticising someone for their stand, going in with all guns blazing and giving absolutely no quarter can lower you to their level and to an outsider, it looks too much like a mirror image situation - both as bad as each other; why would I want to get involved? But when you go in with the kindness and tact that was NOT displayed by the group you are criticising, you get more attention from people who value fair play. What teacher was saying (and please correct me, teacher, if I've got you wrong) was that credit needs to be given to those who worked really hard, because to organise an event like this is a huge task; BUT (and I wish I could make that word bigger) that no amount of such hard work gives ANYONE the right to hold (and enforce) such a narrow-minded opinion. In saying it this way, teacher is ensuring that the organisers can't come back with that argument of "you don't know how hard I worked on this - and to be told we have to share it with those lowlifes is just not fair to me and the other parents who all worked so hard!" Teacher has already knocked those arguments on the head before they ever get the chance to be uttered. It's a very effective way of negotiating and of registering your complaint in a public forum. If you can make it clear that you HAVE considered ALL points of view and you still cannot see how anybody could be so mean, then you will win far more otherwise impartial observers over to your point of view. If you don't do this, you risk ending up looking like Hatfields vs McCoys, with anybody not involved not even wanting to know about the problem. It sounds to me like there is plenty of scope for making a lot of trouble for the people who organised things in such a mean and thoughtless way. Go for it. I would be asking for an apology for the exclusion, as well as an apology from the people who publicly voiced such bigotry. This isn't just about unfair exclusion, it's about removal of CHOICE. And teacher - welcome. And good on you. You are a brave person as well as a master of diplomacy and effective negotiation. Well done. Are you available for cloning? Marg [/QUOTE]
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