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Parent Emeritus
Thoughts on detachment
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<blockquote data-quote="everywoman" data-source="post: 408041" data-attributes="member: 1436"><p>I have been a member of this board since my difficult child was 15. He is now 22---seven long years. Detachment is a daily struggle. To me detachment means I can still love and care about my son, but I can allow him to live with the consequences of his choices. I still accept phone calls, but hang up if he starts being argumentative. I help him out occasionally with money--if it's convenient for me. I do not spend my time looking for resources to help him anymore---he had every chance in the world between the ages of 15 and 21 and he chose to not do the work required to make his life better. He will never live in my home again. He will not guilt me into paying his way. I love and adore him--but I will not be his bank, his psychiatrist, his social worker ever again.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="everywoman, post: 408041, member: 1436"] I have been a member of this board since my difficult child was 15. He is now 22---seven long years. Detachment is a daily struggle. To me detachment means I can still love and care about my son, but I can allow him to live with the consequences of his choices. I still accept phone calls, but hang up if he starts being argumentative. I help him out occasionally with money--if it's convenient for me. I do not spend my time looking for resources to help him anymore---he had every chance in the world between the ages of 15 and 21 and he chose to not do the work required to make his life better. He will never live in my home again. He will not guilt me into paying his way. I love and adore him--but I will not be his bank, his psychiatrist, his social worker ever again. [/QUOTE]
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